AHAV Community Outreach ministry

AHAV Christmas (December 10)

2011-12-21T11:51:00.000-08:00

A few small groups joined AHAV on December 10 to prepare and distribute Christmas packages to the homeless people in the streets. Below is a testimony from one of our volunteers.

Alison's Testimony

A couple weeks ago during the AHAV outreach, Michelle Chu and I met Warren in Port Authority. Warren is a homeless man who used to be a school teacher, and it was clear that he was well educated. He shared with us about his abusive childhood. There was one story that stood out to me most.

His father was an alcoholic, a womanizer and frequently squandered the money he earned. Because of this, his mother took out her anger on Warren by beating him. He recounted one particular instance when his father, who was on his way out to the bar, found Warren barely breathing in his crib. His father rushed Warren to the ER, and the doctors said there was absolutely no chance that Warren would survive. “But the doctors did everything they could. It was a miracle that I survived,” Warren said. I couldn’t help my share with Warren that God is the “ultimate” doctor who heals us physically, emotionally and spiritually because He loves us so much. It is a miracle that He saved us from the eternal death we would have faced.

Warren said that he would never be able to understand how his mother could beat a helpless, innocent child to the point of near-death. I could see the hurt and the confusion in Warren’s eyes, and I saw him in so much pain still years later. Immediately, a very vivid realization came to me. Warren had to suffer because of the sins of his father and his mother. Jesus endured the sins of the entire world- physically, emotionally and spiritually. Jesus was pure and blameless, but yet, he willingly suffered so that we can live in freedom, in joy and in God’s presence.

Please pray that God will restore Warren’s life and that Warren will experience his Father’s love. Please pray that Warren will be able to forgive his mother. Please pray that God will unite Warren back to his children and grandchildren, who are longing for their father/ grandfather to come back home.

~ Alison

Reunited and it feels so good!

2011-12-14T09:35:00.000-08:00

On another beautiful Sunday afternoon that God graciously gave us, we were making our way down 9th ave, as we always do, and I said to Jose (somewhat disappointingly), "You know, we have yet to come across the people we've met before..." And as I said that, I was particularly thinking of two people as they had made quite the mark on my heart the past few weeks. Little did we know that God had planned for us to meet not one, but both of them once again on that beautiful Sunday afternoon.

After speaking for awhile with a girl named Mouse--an avid hitchhiker of 7 years who travels everywhere with her dog, Ruckus--we came across a familiar face: Richard! I was so happy to see him again, as if seeing an old friend. Thankful to have another opportunity to hear a little more of his story and his past, we took time to catch up and to encourage him with the Word. This time, we also got a chance to worship together which was quite awesome. I was also able to share the few verses God had placed in my heart (written in my previous post) for Richard this day and it was quite the blessing. I was also very encouraged when he mentioned that he now has a bible! (Another homeless man was about to throw it away and asked if he wanted it and he said yes!) God is good. He loves Richard. And is making His love for him known indeed!

After spending some quality time with Richard, we ran into yet another familiar face: Andy! At first he shared the awful things that happened to him since the time we last saw him (couple weeks ago) and as his emotions grew stronger while sharing his stories, he asked us to leave him alone for an hour and to come back after he had collected himself. And we did just that and came back an hour later to talk to him and to pray with him once again. God never ceases to surprise me with the ways in which He uses us to encourage Andy to touch his heart (and uses Andy to encourage us likewise). Just to sit with him on the sidewalk under a scaffolding on 8th Ave, holding hands in powerful prayer has been quite the awe-filled experience. To witness Andy alive again--happy, thankful and secure, knowing who He is in Christ. God loves Andy. And is surely pursuing him in the midst of his unstable, alcohol-dependent, corruption-surrounded, panhandling life. He walks with him through it all. Loves him dearly and shows him amazing grace.

God is love. And I'm just so thankful to be a witness and a vessel for this love, His love that conquers all. Thank you Jesus!

~Julia

Mouse and her dog Ruckus

Singing songs with Richard

Spending time with Andy

Sunday with Lorraine

2011-11-22T12:39:00.000-08:00

An old rubber band wraps her silver hair into a single pony tail. Suffering from Parkinson’s disease, she drinks her English breakfast tea with trembling hands. Her sunken eyes speak volumes of pain and cynicism. However, as we depart from Lorraine on this Sunday afternoon, she leaves us with a smile and an unforeseen (wet sloppy) kiss.

This past Sunday was my second outing with AHAV, Remnant Westside’s homeless ministry. As we walked down Eighth Avenue, we met Lorraine near the heart of Times Square. She was carrying five duffel bags tied together on a dolly, a heavy load for someone just shy of eighty years old. After asking her if she needed help, we assisted her across the street and parked ourselves inside a food court.

As we began talking with Lorraine, I grew excited. She began to tell us about a prayer that she recites each morning before starting her day. In my head, I thought that this would be one of those “easy” conversations, where she would tell us about the wonderful things that Jesus was doing in her life. As a result, I was not prepared for what came next.

Before I could realize what was happening, Lorraine began a tirade against different groups of people. She drew examples from her past about how she had been hurt by the government and cheated by her landlords. Lorraine spoke hateful words of prejudice against the homosexual community. To make matters worse, her talking voice quickly elevated to near-shouting. As she continued her harangue, I grew increasingly uncomfortable. I could feel the hot stares of the people around us, who could clearly hear her angry, controversial words.

As she spoke, I prayed silently that God would bring healing to Lorraine’s life. As a group, we could all feel the hurt that underscored each sentence. Although listening to her was difficult and none of us liked the nasty stares we were getting from onlookers, I knew that God had placed us there for a reason. We were called to love Lorraine, to show Christ's love even when it is hard.

Matthew 5:46
If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that?

AHAV has been challenging me to love those whom I would not otherwise. It has encouraged me to be a light in a city that at times seems so dark. That day, as we continued to listen to Lorraine, her rants began to change over time. By the grace of God, she began to share some of the things that bring joy to her life: her humor, her jewelry-making business, her singing. Towards the end of the conversation, she was telling us about the many blessings in her life, and we asked if we could pray over her.

At the end of the prayer, Lorraine wiped the tears from her face with trembling, Parkinson-ridden hands. She thanked us for listening to her, with a smile that stretched from ear to ear. As we left, she hugged Eunice and Julia and gave them an “unforeseen” kiss on the cheek. This past Sunday, I witnessed how the only effective response to hate is love and how as Christians, we have Christ’s amazing example to follow.

~Albert

Albert helping Lorraine with her bags

Helping Lorraine to her resting spot

Lorraine sharing about her life

Giving Lorraine the Gospel of John booklet

Humility

2011-11-19T08:40:00.000-08:00

We started our walk down 51st street towards 8th ave and encountered Eric in front of Starbucks. Eric had a very chill attitude about everything. He was a guitar player who moved to New York to sell his records but something went wrong and now he lives on the street. Although we talked to him for a bit, I sensed this barrier. He seemed like he was really guarding his heart. I mean, I didn’t talk to him as much because Mario came along, but from the short time I talked to him, I think it was really hard for him to talk about his past. We asked him if he wanted to play the guitar that we brought along but he politely refused. We instead played for him 2 songs, He Loves Us and How Great is our God. It seemed to touch him and I really sensed the Holy Spirit moving in that place as we worshipped. God showed me how much he loves Eric and that he is working in his heart.

As we were talking to Eric, Mario, this old Polish man, noticed that we were giving out sandwiches and hot tea and he came up to us. It was pretty difficult understanding what he was saying but we got the gist of it. He was an immigrant from Poland and he just reminded me of a typical grandpa that loves to tell stories. He was very talkative but I really enjoyed it. We didn’t know how to share the gospel of John because of the language barrier, but he did tell us he went to a Catholic church every Sunday. We just prayed over him and I really believe that despite the language barrier, God connected us in a unique but beautiful way.

Lastly, we met Andy around 46th street and 8th ave. Andy was one of those people that I would easily pass by because he didn’t “look homeless.” But man did God humble me right there because I was extremely encouraged and touched by this man. The one thing that really touched me was his strive to love God. He was struggling and he knew it. He always tried to figure out why God did certain things, but he realized that it was too wide to grasp the knowledge and plans of God. For Andy, I think it was a matter of accepting the fact that God is who he is and we can never fully understand him because He’s God and He is just so much bigger than us. It was seriously such an amazing time because the Holy Spirit was working in Andy’s heart right in front of us. He just broke down and said that he really needed this talk and that he’s really grateful that we stopped by. I really love it when people can be real and genuine with their struggles and I was just impressed by his transparency to our team. I mean, this was not a coincidence but we know that God appointed us to Andy that night and it was such a blessing. He sung a couple songs with us and he was in high spirits by the end of our talk. He also asked if he could come to our church and that was just another amazing work of the Holy Spirit.

Since the day that I started Ahav, God has just been showing me humility. The fact that I can learn from the homeless was never something that crossed my mind but after going out every Sunday, I realized that I have a lot to learn from them. For today’s outreach though, God really called me out on judging. It’s so easy for us to judge, but really, who are we to judge? After encountering Andy today, I realized that if I am open and willing to be obedient to God’s word no matter how absurd the situation, He will use us. So many times I know I don’t listen to God when he tells me to go pray for a random homeless on the street because I’m uncomfortable. But today he showed me that through us, we could encourage and help someone that’s struggling and in need of God’s word. This really challenges me to actually stop by a homeless when I see one because God CAN use me. If each of us just stopped by one homeless a day to show and share God’s love, how many lives can God impact through us? This is a daily thought and challenge that God has placed on my heart.

“Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.” Philippians 2:3-8

~Eunice

The group with Andy

Talking with Andy

Singing songs with Eric

Father's Heart

2011-11-11T11:46:00.001-08:00

God allowed us to meet 4 men today. Richard. Douglas. Santana Julio. And William.

Each men had such different stories and personalities, but I don't doubt that God's heart was the same for all four of them. I, however, want to highlight one who tugged at my heart in a special way this day; his name was Richard.

Richard was the first man we approached. 46 years old. A father of 3 daughters. He had traveled from California to Florida to New York and didn't know where he was going next.

At first glance, he appeared very intimidating and rough around the edges--as looks can be very deceiving, we all have learned. He had tattoos all over his face and neck: tattoos of tear drops under his eyes (which I later found out typically indicated the number of killings or years served in prison), the words, mama tried above his left eyebrow, a clown mark above his right eye, and his daughter's name Miranda inscribed around his neck. But the moment we started talking to him, we found him to be such a warm and honest man. And I was in fact very encouraged to have met and talked to him this day.

We asked him what had brought him to New York and he said that he had been traveling, running away really. He said he had done some bad stuff back home and wanted to start anew. When asked what specific prayer requests he had, he responded "protection over his family/daughters." I could sense his genuine care and love for his beloved children back home and how terribly he must be missing them... And I wondered if he knew how much our heavenly Father treasured him and longed to be with him in this same way, or at least in this way that we, as earthly creatures, could comprehend.

We prayed for him and I could just sense such heavy burden, guilt and shame that he was carrying all by himself. And a desperation for wanting to make things right. To start a new life. And I felt convicted to tell him, or remind him even (he had said that he was Christian) that God loved him and that no sin was or will ever be too big for His sufficient mercy and grace. That through it all (all the bad things he may have done), that his Father never stopped loving him, and is right there with him, cheering for him as he searches to start anew. That in fact, He is the God of new LIFE, of new BIRTH. (“Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born again he cannot see the kingdom of God.” -John 3:3)

It was encouraging to see that Richard's heart seemed very willing to listen and receive this truth and my heart smiled when he told us that he was in need of hearing this message today :) I hope we'll run into him again in the following weeks so that we can continue to pray for him and to spur him on as he searches to find new life in Christ.

Here are some verses I dedicate to you Richard and would love to share with you if our Father allows us to cross paths again:

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come. -2 Corinthians 5:17

Remember not the former things, nor consider the things of old. Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert. -Isaiah 43:18-19

The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. “The Lord is my portion,” says my soul, “therefore I will hope in him. -Lamentations 3:22-24

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly. -John 10:10

Thank you Jesus for coming down from heaven to earth, only to die on the cross, so that we may have life (a new and eternal life) and have it abundantly. We love you!

~Julia

Summer Update

2011-07-14T12:25:00.000-07:00

This is an update regarding Summer AHAV

There won't be AHAV this Summer. Nevertheless, if you have an interest in serving in the Fall (Sept-Dec), send an e-mail to ahav@remnantwestside.net

Go Forth - AHAV Video

2011-05-22T22:57:00.000-07:00

We created this video for you. All visuals were taken from our 2005 promo AHAV video. Info source: Coalition for the Homeless - NYC Homelessness Basic Facts (updated April 2011).

AHAV Summer Team 2011

2011-05-10T13:33:00.000-07:00

The Summer team for AHAV will start on June 5th. Team members will be required to commit their Sundays for the duration of June 5th until August 28th (13 weeks). We will be focusing on homeless outreach. Please pray about joining and serving our community in this way this coming session.

Info
- Dates: June 5th until August 28th (13 weeks)
- Time: Sundays, 1-5pm

Targeted Population
- Homeless people in the streets

Outreach Location
- Port Authority and nearby area

Our Work
- Distribute food/drinks
- Provide homeless-related services (shelter locations, etc)
- Share the Gospel

Commitment
- We ask all volunteers not to miss more than 3 AHAV Sundays

If interested or have any questions, send an email to ahav@remnantwestside.net

Follow us in our Facebook page
www.facebook.com/ahavoutreach

In NYC, I walk by the homeless everyday

2011-04-30T07:10:00.000-07:00

In New York City, I walk by the homeless everyday—unaffected, unsympathetic, and unconcerned. I may spare change or offer food, but I usually keep walking. I feel bad when I see pleading hands or trashbags full of discarded rubbish, but I quietly and quickly forget those desperate eyes and decaying teeth. Why do I forget the homeless rather than helping them?

Sometimes, I have things to do: a dinner to get to or school work to attend to. It doesn’t seem like there’s enough time to live my life while helping every hopeless person I pass. Anyways, what can I do? It’s bad to give the homeless money—they’ll probably use it on drugs or alcohol. And if I buy them a meal, isn’t that just a temporary fix? A random meal hardly feels like a meaningful impact on the problems of the homeless.

Also, I think we already have programs for this sort of thing; if a homeless man really wanted to get a job and integrate back into society, couldn’t he? I mean, it seems like lots of homeless people choose not to work. It’s a lifestyle—and this is why homeless people always ask me for gas money because their “car” broke down. It’s always the same story and the same lie.

But after talking with the homeless, I am convinced of one thing: I forget the homeless because their pain is not my problem. If I saw a friend homeless on the street, would I wait for the system or blame my friend for not pulling himself out of his situation? No. I would drop my appointments and work, and restore my friend even if it was inconvenient. Yes, it is true that the cost of helping a homeless person requires more than sporadic donations of money, but I must not confuse the homeless for the hopeless. The truth is that every day I choose to do nothing because it’s inconvenient to care and easy to forget. It’s a lifestyle—and this is why I tell myself that money cannot fix the problems of the homeless when they ask me for gas money to revive their imaginary cars. It’s always the same story and the same lie.

And my most dangerous justification for apathy is Jesus. My knee-jerk reaction when asked to give money to the poor, is that what the homeless really need is Jesus—not food, house, friends, or comfort. And this is true. Our deepest problems and brokenness are rooted in the absence of God from our lives—rich or poor we are all in poverty. But, there is something jarring about the image of walking briskly past the lone hungry man huddled on the corner of 6th Avenue, and going home to watch the newest Office episode while splurging on Jcrew.com for all those overtime hours I worked last week. This image shakes me because I do this every single day. How often do the needs homeless and others really inconvenience my life? Are we apathetic because “the homeless need to know Jesus”, or are we apathetic because don’t really know Jesus?

I am convinced that Jesus is not okay with my choice to regularly forget the needs others. In Luke 10, a lawyer basically asks Jesus, “Who do we have to love?” And Jesus tells him of a man who has been stripped, beaten, and left for dead. One by one, the “best” men of society pass by to see him on the roadside and do nothing. Instead, they walk by and forget. Finally, a Samaritan man passes by. This is a man who has been declared inferior by the type of man lying on the roadside. But, in compassion, the Samaritan binds up the wounds of this beaten man, finds him an inn, takes care of him, and leaves behind money for the beaten man’s needs. Jesus concludes by saying, “You go, and do likewise.”

I have not done likewise. I do not spend my time, heart, and money on the needs of the broken. And so after my first couple weeks of AHAV, this is my prayer and encouragement. Come and see that the people on street corners, who we so easily forget, are real people.

This is your mother who does not have food to eat. This is your father who is despised as less than human. This is your sister who is sexually abused because homeless shelters are not really shelters. This is your best friend written off as he struggles with a drug addiction.

Come and see.

Amos Kim

AHAV donations: Ways you can help Samuel and Sayboria

2011-04-28T09:53:00.000-07:00

Samuel and Sayboria are a homeless couple that are currently staying outside of Port Authority.

We are asking for specific donations. We are providing a list of items they need (AHAV will be giving other items not listed here).

Visit our Facebook page for more details
www.facebook.com/ahavoutreach

Facebook page

2011-04-15T08:38:00.000-07:00

We have created a Facebook page. Follow us at www.facebook.com/ahavoutreach

At AHAV the past few weeks

2011-03-24T10:31:00.001-07:00

At AHAV the past few weeks we have gone to the Port Authority to reach out to the homeless. This week was no different except for the fact that we couldn't find any people for the first half hour. Be that as it may, we eventually got down to business. Here are two encounters.

Learning Unexpectedly
In life, I've come to the realization that we have to take everything as a learning experience - this is how we grow, develop, and mature as Christians. No matter what the situation despite how big or small it is, we can take the experience forward and improve ourselves. I was reminded of this when talking to Moreno. I had trouble hearing what he had to say in several instances - his speech was slurred and it was hard to hear through his accent. I followed most of the conversation and eventually came to an understanding that he was a Christian. He mentioned that he meditates on the Word for at least 2 hours a day. I was so excited to hear this and responded saying, "It's awesome that you have such a great attitude". "It's not an attitude, it's a commitment", he replied.

So many times, we think that we have to stand in front of God with the right attitude. As such, when we sin we feel shame and don't feel like we can approach Him. So while attitude is important, it's not the most critical factor in our walk with God. When we enter into relationship with Jesus Christ, we are making a lifelong commitment with him. That means we have the luxury to share our life with him but the responsibility to worship him unceasingly. I'm reminded of this not from a pastor, not from a book but from a homeless man, my brother in Christ Moreno.

Homeless Benevolence
Next we met a lady named Caroline. She came to the Port Authority carrying several bags and a suitcase to have a seat. As is customary at AHAV I asked how she was doing and if she wanted some coffee. She said that she was fine and instead asked me if I wanted orange juice. I was taken aback as this is not something I've ever heard from a homeless person. This showed me how kind hearted and selfless Caroline was. We continued to talk and I found out that she had been wrongfully evicted despite having made all her rent payments on time. As a result she is out on the street waiting for her case to be heard and reviewed in the courts. Her eviction happened in June 2010 so needless to say the process has been long and arduous. She explained to me that the court system moves slowly and doesn't consider the situations that people may be in. With no place to stay Caroline was in need of a woman's shelter so we referred her to the Bowery Mission - hopefully she finds a nice, warm, and safe environment there.

I eventually discovered that Caroline was an avid reader and kept up with the latest and greatest by reading some novels from the New York Times bestsellers list. John mentioned that she might like the Bible, the bestselling book of all time. We gave one to her and were about to get on our way but before we left she asked, "how will I find you again?" Confused, I didn't know what to say. She asked again, "how much do I owe you for this?" Surprised, I finally understood. "It's a free gift", I replied. And with this free gift, I hope she comes to an understanding of the most awesome and perfect gift that is found in Jesus Christ.

We did get a chance to pray with Caroline about her specific needs and concerns but continue to pray. Continue to pray for her court case, her wellbeing (finding a woman's shelter), and most of all finding salvation in Jesus Christ. The homeless people are no different than you and me. They may have encountered unfortunate circumstances but they can be some of the nicest people you'll ever meet - you just have to get to know them.

Kevin

Where dreams are made

2011-03-16T15:55:00.000-07:00

Today I met a man who couldn’t forgive himself, and a woman who had nothing to forgive. The man’s name was John; the woman’s name Terry.

We met Terry first. Her shoes were off. She was sitting next to a large black trash bag and an old, worn out backpack on some steps at the Port Authority bus terminal. We greeted her while she played bejeweled on her disposable cell phone.

“Oh hello, would I like something? Oh no, nothing at all. I don’t need nothin, I’m fine. I’m fine. Oh this? Oh, I get it. You must’ve seen this, and assumed—Oh, I get it, you must’ve assumed that—Oh, no, I don’t need nothin. I’m fine.”

She talked with intensity and passion and smiled wide grins that revealed a gap between her two front teeth. She would make grand hand gestures with each figure of speech, and then would suddenly bring her arms down into her lap as if surrendering. She would look down at her hands like we had disappeared and she were grasping for the memory of us.

We noticed her foot was misshapen, and asked her how it happened.

“Oh this thing? This old thing? That was a freak accident of nature. I broke it - long time ago. When the doctors—when the doctors tried to set it, they messed up and it didn’t—it didn’t heal properly. So it’s been like this for a long time. But I’m fine. I can run, jump, hop, skip just like you. I’m fine.

“You see, they said—the doctors said if they broke it again they could align it properly and it could—it could heal, but I don’t want to break it again - that’s too painful. You see, I’m fine. It looks funny, but I live with it. Yeah, I live with it.”

We met John later, while talking to a homeless couple married thirty seven years now. He walked up to us, asked us if we had food or drink. Then he spilled his guts.

“It’s tough - it’s the worst thing - being out here on these streets. But you know, I don’t blame no one but myself. I take all the responsibility. I don’t blame society. I don’t blame God—even though sometimes I get angry at Him. I never blame God. I know what I did was wrong. I know I made my mistakes.”

He had a bruise on his head. He told us he got it because he drank too much alcohol the night before. He said it served him as a reminder not to do it again. His eyes were wet and, I think, swollen from tears.

“It’s like this, you know that prostitute who was going to get stoned and Jesus walked up and was drawing in the sand and said that if anyone is without sin let him be the first to cast the stone? You know, the people, they all knew they had sin, and one by one they dropped their stones.

“That’s how it is, I made my mistakes. If you had asked me when I was twenty if I was going to be forty five and homeless, I would’ve thought you were crazy - no way I was going to be homeless. If I had known I would’ve prepared better, I would’ve gotten an education. But I can’t go back, I can’t change the past. I just gotta accept it and move on.”

Today I met a man who couldn’t forgive himself, and a woman who had nothing to forgive. The Gospel is Good News to them both. To him, it is forgiveness; and to her, it is promise. Forgiveness means that the flesh has been crucified with Christ, the old is gone and the new has come. Promise means that His grace is sufficient for us, for His power is made perfect in weakness.

Our hearts may condemn us—and even deny us—but God is greater than our hearts, and He knows everything.

John

He gave us stories

2011-03-16T15:53:00.000-07:00

In her fingers she held something between a cigar and a cigarette. It was brown, smouldering, and near its end. She lived at the Port Authority, a busy bus terminal filled with travelers. People going somewhere, people waiting for something, and people—like her Swisher Sweets—stuck somewhere in between.

“Hi Happy, how are you?”

“I’m good, good. Things are good.”

She smiled reluctantly. Thin makeup clung to her cheeks shielding her from the cold. Polish covered her fingernails like torn paint from park benches. Her poofy jacket inadequate. Her body a slow shiver.

Her lips spoke, “Just finishin up my paperwork. Almost all done. If only I had a place to store my stuff. You’d think there was somewhere in Manhattan to leave your stuff, but all the good spots taken. I mean, once I store my stuff, then maybe turn in that paperwork, get a job. Get a good job, make some money. Just enough money, find a place to sleep. Just wanna be comfortable, gotta take care of my self, gotta get what I need. But first, I need to find a place to store my stuff…”

Her eyes told a different story than her lips. They—like half moons hanging over her cheeks—welled up slowly with tears and betrayed her heart. Every few seconds she brought the brown smouldering stick to her mouth, inhaled and looked away. She’d point at her possessions: a box on wheels, a blanket and some clothes. Her cheeks—chubby, high, acne scarred—quivered at every cold word she let out into the cold world.

Dispossessed from the inheritance of her namesake, she was broken on the inside. After expressing her hopes and dreams, her plans to get back on her feet, she ended with this, “And then maybe… Just maybe, find someone to love me.”

I forgot to tell her.

We love you Happy.

He loves you.

~John

2010-12-10T14:08:00.000-08:00

I am one of very little faith. Last two weeks, God showed me how pathetic my faith is. But he also revealed me how great his love is, through the service and through AHAV ministry.
This week, I met this street vendor named Dolkar. She just started working in the Columbus Area. She was staring at me while I was talking to my friend Steven who I met through AHAV. She was curious why this Asian girl was giving him hot beverage in this cold weather and talking to him. Since she kept looking at me for a while, I decided to talk to her.
She is from Tibet, and her cousin street vendor, so she started to do this work. She is a devout Buddhist and she said she was frustrated because the business wasn’t going well. But her face lit up when I gave her a cup of coffee and she asked me why I do this. I ended up spending the time speaking with her about my faith and how I believe that God is with us. She said, “God bless you.” She also asked for my phone number because she wanted to remain in contact with me.

Each week I am amazed by what God does through the AHAV ministry. I realized that He not only leads us to homeless people whom he loves and cares for, but he also exists within us. I am also very thankful how he gave me opportunities to talk to homeless people, even when I know don't deserve to do His work. He made me realize that I cannot do anything without him through hardships and he showed me his unconditional love towards me. And I believe that he desires me to share his love to people who are in needs. I also began to see hopes within them as Pastor Bruce said, because I learned that God uses the weak and helps the people who are in needs.

"Therefore, my dear brothers, stand firm, Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the lord is not in vain."

-1Corinthians 15:58

Thank you God for using us in your plan. We pray that people on the streets find peace and hope in the darkness. We also pray that people come to see that Jesus is way, truth and the life.

-Lisa

2010-11-19T13:26:00.001-08:00

“God is good. Do you really believe it? That despite the thousands of homeless on the streets of New York City, despite the rampant poverty and hurting souls around us, despite our own pain and suffering, that God is good? It’s hard to say it, ‘despite horrendous injustices, despite utter despair and hopelessness, despite any circumstance, God is good.’ Or rather it’s easy to say it.”
I wrote this one year ago while serving in Ahav, and still struggle with this today. My heart breaks for the people I see on the streets- those who have nowhere to turn when the rain comes down. Sometimes I wonder: Why do things have to be this way? Why do people’s lives have to be so difficult? And the next step to this progression of questions is easy- blame God.
Over the last year, there is one thing I am beginning to understand more and more. He is the God of redemption. We all fall down and the rain falls on each of us; and it is exactly in this moment that He shines. In the rainbow after the storm, we see God’s promise of hope and restoration. He picks us up, He sends brothers and sisters to restore us, and He never abandons us. This is where we see His beauty best- in the redemption of the broken.
Tim has been homeless for 15 years, just about half his life. He has been all around the country with his girlfriend, sleeping wherever they can. He has been arrested multiple times and he drinks and smokes to stay warm. He has served in the military. He can lay down a beat and freestyle. He can play guitar and entertain a crowd. And though he may not know God, God still loves him. The name of our ministry is Ahav, which is the root of the Hebrew word for love. So as Ahav, we go out as God’s love for His people. If I believe God is to blame for Tim’s brokenness, I will never believe Tim can turn to God. So instead, I declare that God is good, that He loves His people, and that He is jealous for them.
Jesus describes the kingdom of heaven as a merchant who gives up everything for the pearl of great value. The broken people we see are those pearls that He is looking to purchase and redeem. God, I pray that You would change our hearts to see Your redemption plan. I pray that we may be vessels of Your love for Your broken people. Amen.

Love in Him,
Andrew

2010-11-10T09:41:00.000-08:00

This particular Sunday was special to New Yorkers because of the annual marathon that encompasses all 5 boroughs, culminating in the heart of Manhattan, Central Park. As we prepared to set out, we didn't anticipate how this would impact our ministry plans. At first, we could only see how this served only as a hindrance to our familiar visiting grounds. But God started to open our eyes to take a look around at each being walking alongside us. I thought, "God loves everyone one of them. How can God love every one of us?" His love is so great, the thought was overwhelming. But instead of dismissing people with a passing glance. I took a good look at their faces. Studied their eyes, their gestures. I said to myself. Christ loves you, incredible.

Lisa, Jose and I walked from Columbus Circle toward Dewitt Clinton Park in silence. I couldn't help be distracted by the wind chill that was hitting my face. I started to sing because at least, I knew the words would flow out of me. I met a man named Matthew, who was listening to the Jets game on the radio. Lisa and I sat with him, offered him a sandwich and coffee. He was a gentleman, pulling out a thick blanket for me to sit on so I don't have to sit on a cold seat. He told us about his time in the army, his experience working as a photography assistant, and living in New York in the early 70s, playing the recorder with some of the best jazz bands. Often, our objective as disciples is blinded by the end goal to make a new disciple. It's difficult to just sit and enjoy each other, but I think that's when you get to really study someone. You pick up on their nuances, their shining qualities- you get to see what Christ sees.

I'm praying that as we continue to visit him and other friends, our intention is not to go with our agenda. But to only go with the intention of loving this person because Christ loved us first. It's to surrender our words and our actions to allow the Holy Spirit to take full control of the situation.

2010-11-03T10:26:00.000-07:00

I am a forgetful person. I tend to forget where I’ve placed my glasses and realize about an hour later I’ve been wearing them all along. I lose pens and whimper. I use cash and am curiously dumbfounded when I come to my last dollar. Before running off to class, I hunt for the last pair of shoes I’ve thrown into perhaps an invisible corner somewhere in my room. I tend to forget a great deal of other things. In the willingness to love others, I, in eagerness, love with the mentality of “I can” rather than “Christ did”. In the hub of serving God, I forget God and remember myself. And it’s so easy to do so because I can lean on my own experiences and the wisdom from past mistakes, and somehow fall into the indent of self sufficiency.

But, I love how patient our God is because he understands. What an intimate God we serve! God reminded me to forget myself and remember Christ. “Always remember that Jesus Christ, a descendant of King David, was raised from the dead. This is the Good News I preach. And because I preach this Good News, I am suffering and have been chained like a criminal. But the word of God cannot be chained. So I am willing to endure anything if it will bring salvation and eternal glory in Christ Jesus to those God has chosen.” 2 Timothy 2:8-10. As Paul wrote to Timothy, he said to remember Christ. Clearly, Timothy in his ministry hasn’t literally forgotten who Christ was, but rather, reminded him the importance of falling back on the truth and beauty of God’s character and Christ’s surrender on a daily basis. Paul understood his forgetfulness and God knew of our forgetfulness.

As our team stepped onto the battlefield, I was aware of the enemy’s presence. The devil was not happy at all to see us serving our God. Spiritual gifts kicked in and I sensed a soon to be outpouring of God’s power upon Columbus Circle. As we spoke to new people, served coffee and offered snacks, the enemy tried to show off his power. As we prayed, God told me we had to pray even more. “Remember me, Dahae.” After our first batch of prayers, I felt the need to pray once again. As Sarah prayed against distractions, specifically the cold, a great gust of wind came upon us. I, however, laughed inside. The devil may be showing off his power, but God was doing glorious work in us. God would not allow us to fall upon our self sufficient nature. God was flexing his muscles. With great patience, He said, “Remember me.” God was showing off his power in us.

God is with us. It’s in his very name, Emmanuel, that he dwelled with us and sent his Holy Spirit. I am encouraged to know that God, in his very nature does not forget us and that his promises cannot be broken. He himself is the only one who can promise on himself! Wherever our team goes, I go with confidence knowing that Christ is doing the heavy lifting. Whatever mockery, whatever persecution, whatever comes our way, we know our truth- The word is not bound!

So, I pray for our team, that the second half of the verse would be true in our hearts. I pray for the willingness to endure all things for the sake of those who are in need, that they too may know the beauty of the God that cannot swerve. God, I ask confidently that you empty us so that we can be filled with the love of Christ. Fear cannot take us when love is with us.

Sincerely,

Dahae Kim

2010-09-02T13:24:00.000-07:00

This week was only Jose and I out in a mission to serve the homeless people. Soe Yeong was sick, and Ann's off to Cali :-( nyways.. the start was good. We realized that we wanted to focus on long term relationship that we mutually and naturally have with the homeless people. It's about the quality over quantity.

"Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen" | Hebrews 11:1
We went to Dewitt park. No one was there, even Matthew who usually has weekly conversations with us not there. We met with a lady that I had a couple of conversations with. I forgot her name but she was always there in the same bench. She was always concerned with health, beauty, and safety. But, reflecting upon our conversations, I realize how God's love always live within us. At the beginning she was reluctant to have a conversation with us. But now she remembers us and discusses her concerns. Even though she doesn't share her life and just simple conversations, im sure in time she will :-)
After talking to her we were heading for central park and it started to rain. We had our simple conversations with the Tibetans as they were packing their stuff. My heart aches when i found out the reality the lady had to go through. She has two sons back home and is pregnant with one with very long hours of work everyday. She has no choice but to sell the painting thingie.
Jose and I headed back and reflected upon today's outreach. It was short due to the weather. But it was God calling us to reflect upon the relationships we had with the homeless people. Love is all around us and God is never going to give up on any of us. We just need to committed in what we do and faith in it.

~Nixie

A Testimony from AHAV Spring 2010

2010-06-27T19:02:00.000-07:00

Up until this past January, I've never felt the call to homeless ministry. I have always lived a very comfortable upper-middle class life, and, even as a college student in New York City, I am still quite sheltered from the physical, emotional, and spiritual needs of these people.

At the Urbana Missions Conference in St. Louis this past winter, God really spoke to me through a couple of verses I had come across that weekend (Acts 2:42-47, Mt. 25:40). I had made a commitment to God that I would join the AHAV ministry at RWC once I got back from winter break in New York.

But, unfortunately, I had lost sight of the calling once I returned to New York. I had allowed myself to be consumed by all of the busyness and worries that came along with college life and had left this calling behind. It was not until February, when I was reminded by a sermon of the calling that God had given me two months prior. It felt like a big smack in the head, a reminder that this life that I have is not my own to live, but that I belong to Christ.

I joined AHAV a couple of weeks later, and it ended up being just me and Jose for the semester. Each week, we would begin with a time of worship and prayer and talk about the outreach for the day. Then we'd go out to Madison Square Park or Penn Station with care packages filled with necessities and tumblers filled with either hot coffee or iced tea (depending on the weather), and talk with the homeless people.

Each week we would do this, and we'd usually end up spending the majority of the ministry time speaking with one individual who would usually tell us about their life and talk about faith and God with us. There was one lady in particular whom I remember quite clearly. Her name was Crystal, and we met her at a street corner near Penn Station. She didn't look too well, so Jose and I asked her if she wanted anything to eat. She asked for a salad, so we dropped by a place around the corner and came back with it.

We suspected she had diabetes, because she kept making sure the food/drink we were giving her didn't have sugar. As she was eating the salad, before Jose even spoke about God, Crystal mentioned that she liked to read the Bible, but didn't have one. After a couple of minutes of chatting, Jose decided to go back to the church office to pick up a Bible there for her. I stayed and talked with Crystal for the meanwhile.

As I was standing there talking with her, I noticed people giving us weird stares as they were walking by. I guess the sight was a bit strange: a short chubby homeless black lady sitting on the street corner with a lanky nerdy-looking Chinese boy. After a few minutes of discomfort, I got over it, and decided that it didn't matter. I asked her about her life a bit. I asked about where she grew up, her family, and her past with Christianity. I'm usually not very eloquent or good at small talk or anything, so there were a bunch of awkwardly long silences. I prayed a bit during those times, and after a while, a random guy with a parrot walked by (yeah, a parrot!). We both had a good laugh out of that, and she began just telling me about day-to-day life on the streets, and the weird things that she's seen and experienced.

After a while, I began to realize that the homeless that I've been serving in AHAV, are not just a bundle of needs and pity, but are people we are especially called to love and care for. I think one of the most important lessons I learned in my time serving is that this life that we live as Christians will be costly. We are called to love one another, and, a lot of the times, loving another person will not always be comfortable or pleasant. Loving our family, our brothers and sisters, the homeless, all require patience, grace, and faith. There is so much brokeness in this world, and, as Christ came and dwelt among us in our brokeness, we are called to do the same for the brothers and sisters and lost people that God has placed in our lives. "And the Word became flesh and dwelt among us, and we have seen his glory, glory as of the only Son from the Father, full of grace and truth" (John 1:14 ESV).

~Jeremy

The Power of Prayer

2010-06-22T22:08:00.000-07:00

June 20th 2010. It was my first day serving in the AHAV ministry. Being nervous and excited at the same time, I got a fast chinese food for lunch to give me energy for the day. Thinking of the day ahead of me, I was reluctant and clueless in knowing what im suppose to do. Ive been always encouraged of actions that my brothers and sisters who have shared. Nevertheless, approaching people and just sharing God was going to be a whole new experience for me.

"O Lord, open my lips, and my mouth will declare your praise." Psalms 51:15

Few hours of AHAV began as we introduced ourselves and shared our thoughts and feelings about the ministry. Each individual has their own story and motivation in joining the ministry, all for the glory of God. It was a great introduction and motivation in understanding for each other. We became one body for Christ as we all were getting to know each other. Jose also opened up the ministry with facts and short stories of homeless people. It truly inspired and amazed us all. Homeless was one of the greatest problem of New York. We then focused on praying. Jose explained that the power of prayer is the greatest power of all and we dedicated our time in praying together and for each other. We were hoping with the time we had today, no matter what will happen, it will all be about quality over quantity: just about delivering a message of hope and love of Christ.

It was down to three of the members and our leader, Jose to minister for the day. We visited the park near the church. Even though there was a baseball field and children that was active in the park, there was a rather gloomy area. We were divided into two teams of two and served ice tea.

I first came across an old lady sitting and listening to music on the benches protected with an umbrella. She recognized our church that have ministered before the one year renovation. She didn't want to introduce her name, confidently saying that her constant travel would not allow us to meet again. Nevertheless, she said a brief thank you and wished to be left alone.

The ministry led the four of us to our next person, Ali. He was sitting with another man, Matthew with a cup of coffee and small snacks on a small chess table. He looked happy with our warmth and interest in offering a drink. Our short conversation led to Ali's openness in describing his new painful days of being homeless. He was in the marines and became homeless since the beginning of this year. Sleepless days made him scared and tired all the time. He didn't want his children in California to know about his situation. Situations of his struggle to find a place to sleep, and to survive are overshadowed with fear. He is simply concerned with his bruises on his leg, days without a shower and unchanged clothing. These simple things we have often taken for granted and have meant so much to him.

Throughout our talk, he kept saying "God is good." His humble and painful eyes pierced through to my heart. I was speechless and was thankful of his willingness to share his life. After praying for our new friend, we decided to minister to other homeless people. As Jose and I sat down on the bench, Ali came to us. He shared how he was going to commit suicide tonight but our visit have changed his mind. Through Jesus, we have changed a man's live. I was shocked and yet relieved. I said, "thank you. thank you for letting us know. thank you for staying strong and not giving up."

this is just the begining. There are more days to come.

"When the righteous cry for help, the Lord hears and delivers them out of all their troubles. The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit. Many are the afflictions of the righteous, bu the Lord delivers him out of them all."Psalms 34:17-19

Thank you God for using us in your plan. Saving Ali especially. That made my day, my whole week. Our time spent in praying for our hopes in helping others for the glory of God was truly amazing.

~Nixie

Sympathy

2010-04-06T20:30:00.001-07:00

The best days are the days you realize how to breathe.

Sitting at the window of an air-conditioned Starbucks, I sat staring out on to 23rd and 6th only a quarter filled with the brightly-clothed tourist. The sunlight felt nice. The frappacino was a little watery and a misuse of $4, but, it was worth the trade off to sit on their high chair and wide windows facing the traffic. With a drink in my hand and the other supporting my head, my thoughts began to untangle and rewind. With so many worries pervading every useful thought, it was a relief to stop, rest, and step back from my messy life.
Staring out, I saw a man sitting at the corner with a sign in his lap. “Hungry and homeless.”

1st thought: Get back into the practice of helping.
2nd thought: Don’t help.
3rd thought: You’re fulfilling a personal obligation. Why make yourself into an idol?
16th thought: God, I know too well that I search for the things of this world. You told us to encourage the timid and help the weak. See my obedience and reveal your heart.

He couldn’t remember his seven year old daughter’s name. His name was Michael and he hung a man from a lamppost in revenge to the coma he suffered in result of the former’s brutal mugging. With hands covered in dirt, I shook his hand. His face was still in shock as I offered him a big mac meal. However, for the next few minutes I was the one who stood in shock as he began the story of his life and the spiraling chaos that brought him to the streets. His wife, who took his daughter, left him.

The most surprising emotion overtook me that fateful afternoon. For just a few moments with Michael, I had a glimpse into Jesus’ ministry. I found myself laughing and joking. I found myself curious. And, I felt, for the first time, a moment without judgment. Walking away, I was astounded. For the first time, I saw the man and not the sin. I saw the man in need of prayer. For the first time, I left the judging to God. And I told myself, as I stood waiting for the subway, “Is this how Jesus did it? Did his heart also break as the rest of the world walked the two extra feet to avoid those unaccepted? Did his heart soar as he spoke to those lonely and lost? Is this how he loved despite the sin that made us filthy?” It was just a glimpse of experiencing his ministry, but I was completely blessed.

I saw the cost of living the life Jesus did. Surely this love is a horribly and wonderfully beautiful revelation; Love is messier than I knew it to be. How true these words are- This is love for God: to obey His commands. And His commands are not burdensome (1 John 5:3). My heart searched for acceptance, thanks, glory, appreciation, flattery, attention, fulfillment and as these emotions began to fight over each other for their place in exaltation, I heard the small voice cry out- God, send me.

The best days are the days you realize why you breathe.

looking back

2009-12-21T06:31:00.000-08:00

I struggled hard with my decision of whether or not to join AHAV this semester. My reservations were selfish: it was a long commitment to a ministry I had never previously considered before, I didn't know of anyone else who was joining, and I was terrified of the street evangelism portion of the outreach. For some reason, I had no fear of speaking about Christianity or my faith with the homeless, who were people I would see week after week, but I was afraid of the rejection I might receive from the "not homeless" people who I most likely would never meet again. On the other hand, I knew the simple fact that God had given me a heart for the homeless of NYC since 2003 when I was a freshman at NYU. With encouragement from my small group, a good amount of prayer, and the knowledge that this was something God was calling me to do, I decided on the last day to join. And it's been quite the semester.

Looking back at the past four months, there are a few major things I'll take away from having served in AHAV. First and foremost are the relationships I've built at Open Doors with the homeless and the impact we've made on each other. There is one friendship I built at AHAV that particularly left an impact on me. I met a woman, Lynne, who worked as a restaurant cook before a series of unfortunate events hit that suddenly left her homeless. It is not her story that shocked me but the love she exhibited for aspects of her life that were not taken away by homelessness. Her passion for reading, for starters, specifically of Joyce Carol Oates' writing, was something I admired and discussed with her each week despite the fact that I rarely read anything that's not required of me (or has lots of pictures). Lynne was so grateful for still having the ability to read, to get books and newspapers, and above all to now have "all the time in the world" to read that it's hard to not admire her spirit. I don't know the last time I looked at life like that but it certainly put things into better perspective for me. Beyond books, however, Lynne and I discussed our personal struggles and frustrations, our faiths (she's Catholic), and our hopes for the future. The week I met Lynne, she shared with me her story and allowed me to pray for her. The next week after praying together, she asked me how I was doing and though I hesitated at first, I told her about my struggles at work. The following Sunday she told me she prayed for me all week and asked if I could feel it, and it was seriously one of the biggest blessings I've ever experienced.

My experiences serving in the AHAV ministry are proof to me that God is good and He works in mysterious ways, always according to His sovereign plan. Through the people we've met, the stories we've heard, and the changes in people we've seen in a matter of weeks, I keep getting blown away by what God does through our small ministry. I can only imagine what He would do through all His children if they followed their calling to serve Him within our city of New York.

-Victoria Sung

From the valley to new found glory

2009-12-02T06:03:00.000-08:00

This Sunday, routine ensued as we headed off to Columbus Circle, praying beforehand for the filling of the Spirit and to be empowered and equipped with His abilities, not our own. Yes, we prayed this every Sunday, but how much did we have faith that the supernatural could and can still happen through our very hands? I will admit that in my mind, I wondered how eternally significant and meaningful this almost “routine” evangelism would be. At Columbus Circle, so many of the people we speak to either just passing by or sitting at their respective vendor stands are stuck in their own ways. What can the words and imperfect love of man do to bring cynical or immobile people to the Almighty King?
Though I felt this spiritual burden, or rather restlessness, I, along with the rest of the team, moved out into the fields to see what of the harvest the Lord had prepared for us on this Sunday. With our beverages, Styrofoam cups, and chocolate-chip cookies, we approached the Tibetan vendors on the outskirts of Columbus Circle. Annabel and I spoke with Tabeed, Tom, and their relatives sitting by, as we poured warm cups of hot chocolate for our God-delivered strangers on this Sunday afternoon. Initially, we tried just connecting person to person, before trying to delve into a conversation on spirituality and the love of Christ. They had been here for about 5 years or so, and more than anything, I was impressed at their persevering joy in the midst of conditions that were far from favorable.
Then the question sneaked into the open: “why are you guys doing this?” For this breakthrough in the conversation, I praise God. Yet, the responses to my response convey to me many things. I just remember smiling as widely as I could, to tell them that we are here to display the love of Jesus Christ that He has shown to me, and to obey His commandment to show this love to my neighbors. They simply nod their heads and smile modestly. The breakthrough moment I had foreseen in my heart quickly fizzled out.
Was it a problem with my approach? Have I been muddling the all-powerful and all-surpassing love of Christ due to my fear of alienating these genuinely hospitable people? I don’t know what it was exactly, but something felt amiss. I have been evangelizing at Columbia University for the past three months, much to only encounter similar, apathetic responses of people suddenly retreating into tempered silence. Perhaps I had grown so impatient with fruitlessness. Even more frightening was the ever-present possibility that it was something I was doing that led to this lack of fruit. Tabeed and Tom’s genuine thanks for our demonstrations of love and their indiscriminate openness to Annabel and I have created a longing even stronger than before to lead these friends into the refreshing, overwhelming love and righteousness found in Jesus Christ.
I still don’t really have an answer to this contemplative civil war ensuing in my mind. However, just telling our new friends that Jesus Christ loved them before us, which is why we could love them as such, I clung onto a mustard seed of faith that a sliver, a morsel, even the smallest inkling of Christ’s love had been planted. And all the more was I reminded of how important it is to “do the work of an evangelist” by faith, and not by my own sight. With my eyes, it is very easy to be downcast and to think that barrenness implies utter failure. But just as God has been faithful to those who trusted in His calling, I trust that through this ministry and our acts of obedience, God is still sovereign yesterday, today, and for eternity to come.

Next up was Open Doors, and for me, this was a struggle. I have been finding it incredibly difficult to connect on a level that extended into realms of mutual trust and intimacy. Regardless, God commanded me to “go,” and what else must I do but obey! I first approached a man named Lloyd. He was born and raised in Brooklyn, and he said he always came to Open Doors for food and for a place to stay. So far this semester, I can probably say that Lloyd was one of the most terse, closed-off people I had met at Open Doors. His responses never returned with anything more than I had asked, and it seemed as if he were more vexed by my presence than curious. He said he hasn’t been looking for a job, housing, or anything else. And he was so proud in admitting this too. At this, I just about gave up; how was I supposed to show Christ’s love to a person who felt like he didn’t even need his own best efforts to stay alive?
Then the conversation became just plain confusing. I asked if he had been raised Christian or had any religious upbringing as a child, to which he tersely, sternly, and almost angrily replied no. Delving deeper into his present life, he said he did not consider himself affiliated with any religion. “Are you Christian?” “No.” “Do you believe in God, and that Jesus Christ died for your sins?” “Oh yea, of course…”
Perhaps God was testing me with my patience here, a quality I know I have fallen in many times. Clarification proved utterly useless, as I just ended up confusing myself even more. The aforementioned thoughts of futility and hopelessness crept back once more. Maybe this is a season, for God to humble me and show me what I’m really made of. And right now, honestly and wholly truthfully speaking, it’s hard to say that God’s ministry through AHAV, on my part, is done through faith. If there is one thing I despise is sugarcoating things and beating around the bush, which is why I am being, perhaps too brutally honest about myself and with this group. All the more so, because God has revealed to me the brutal truth about my condition, I am wholly, utterly, and completely at His mercy to show me grace and forgiveness. Furthermore, I know that my Potter will build me up and shape me into the form He wants me to take. Because of this, I have hope of greater beauty, revelations, and grace.

Lord, I desperately need you. Please, show me your fingerprints in this world and your transformative hand in my soul.

God at work

2009-11-26T22:56:00.000-08:00

Prior to Ahav, I hadn’t even noticed how many street vendors there were at Columbus Circle. This past Sunday was the first time I had ever stopped to talk to them. I talked to a man whose nickname is Tsunami. He’s from Tibet, like most of the street vendors at the Circle. He’s in his mid-50s, his wife is here in New York, but his kids are in India. He makes money by selling his photos at the Circle March through about December, and takes the cold winter months off. He shared how competition is pretty fierce and how he has to wake up early every morning to make sure he has the spot he wants at Columbus Circle. He shared his favorite photo with me, which is a photo of a pub in New York. He said it is the oldest pub in the city, and very often he and his Tibetan friends go there to drink and have a good time. His eyes lit up when telling me about the unique beers that pub had; you apparently couldn’t get those beers anywhere else in the city. He lit up his cigarette and continued to talk to me. He seemed so satisfied with life. But my heart broke for him. “If only he knew God… if only he knew God,” I thought.

He said he had friends who go to church, and they’d ask him to come, but he’d always come up with excuses for not going. If he’s not out at Columbus Circle, he’d rather be sleeping, or drinking, or just be at home with his wife. That day, I could only leave him with a gentle nudge that he should follow his friends to church one day. While walking back to the fountain for worship time, I prayed for our encounter next week. I asked God, “Would you please show him that there is so much more to life than this….”

Open Doors.

Rodrigo. I remember when I first met him the beginning of this semester. I approached him with some hot chocolate and kashi cookies and he rejected them. I asked him questions, only to get back terse one- word answers. He put up a wall so high, I didn’t think I’d ever be able to get through. But week after week, even if I were busy serving other people hot drinks/food, I always made time somewhere in the hour we were at Open Doors to talk to him.

God is good. He is always at work.

The past two Sundays, Rodrigo would come find me first and start talking. He’d share about his week and his struggles before I even asked. This past Sunday, he had a huge smile on his face as he approached me. He said “guess what, guess what!” as he pulled something small from his pocket to show me. It was a key. He had gotten a small apartment for him and his wife. I felt blessed to be able to share in his happiness. Praise God.

Kevin. Definitely not your typical homeless person. He reads the news more than I do. He’s aware of what’s going on in the world today more than I do. We talk about current events. We talk about finance. He talks to me about clips he’s seen on YouTube of my CEO in various interviews. We talk about politics. We talk about God. He’s not a Christian. He’s actually very skeptical of Christianity. But he’s curious.

God is good. He is always at work.

When I first met him, he’d just share about why he doesn’t believe in Christianity. How things just don’t make sense to him. He had his reservations and that was that.

Now, my time with him at Open Doors is just not enough to cover the types of questions he has… what is grace? What is the difference between grace and faith versus works? Why is the Bible filled with so many “contradictions”? We correspond via email throughout the week and he’s quoting bible verses across the Old and New Testaments and asking why different verses seem to contradict each other.

Praise God for instilling in Kevin this curiosity. He wants to make sense of the Word, and that is so encouraging to me.

God is good all the time. All the time God is good.

Threading Needles

2009-11-11T21:07:00.000-08:00

This past Sunday, the AHAV team began the community outreach portion of its ministry. Before heading over to the Open Door like we would usually do, we walked to a crowded Columbus Circle and established ourselves around a tall fountain.

In preparation, we split up into two groups to balance the various aspects of our ministry including worship, service, evangelism, and prayer. At Columbus Circle, Group A had the task of worship and prayer while Group B was focused on service and evangelism; the groups switched roles at the Open Door. Group A prepared wrapped cookies to give to those at the Open Door while Group B made love packages to hand out to those encountered at Columbus Circle.

My feelings leading up to this first day of community outreach consisted of apprehension, nervousness, and most of all, fear. In the past, I’ve participated in this sort of seed-planting evangelism and have not had good experiences with it. It’s hard facing rejection and alienation time and time again. People don’t make eye contact with you and they slowly position their bodies in a manner that is ready for escape. Thus, I had an almost deep-set disdain for this type of evangelism, especially street evangelism. How can someone come to know God through a small Bible verse and a five second encounter?

I expressed this to my friend on the subway heading to RWC last Sunday morning: Street evangelism simply does not work. One needs to form a relationship with a non-Christian before ministering to them; a certain amount of trust needs to be established. In response, my friend replied that God can use that seemingly insignificant moment, that five second encounter to get to someone’s heart. He can speak through that small Bible verse in ways we may never comprehend.

Then Jesus said to his disciples, "I tell you the truth, it is hard for a rich man to enter the kingdom of heaven. Again I tell you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God."

When the disciples heard this, they were greatly astonished and asked, "Who then can be saved?"

Jesus looked at them and said, "With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible."

Matthew 19:23-26

With only my lack of faith and a short “excuse me”, it is impossible to minister to a hurried businessman, an occupied socialite, or a curious tourist. Indeed, that five second encounter will be the fleeting moment that I saw it as and it will amount to nothing. However, our God, with his beautiful intricacies and omnipotence, who can thread a desert camel through the eye of a needle, can make an apparently ephemeral encounter a life-changing experience. My friend explained to me that our being there that day may have allowed a stranger to hear the name “Jesus” for the first time or have a first look at scripture. The point is, we must have faith that God can use us through simple means.

After concluding the day’s community outreach, we regrouped and walked over to the Open Door. As usual, we carried our tumblers filled with hot beverages and our wrapped Kashi cookies, possible mediums into hopeful conversation. I had a few nice conversations here and there while filling cups with hot green tea, but God really impacted me near the end of our time there.

We had regrouped somewhat around this time and decided to finish the day with worship. While we sang, a man slowly walked towards us and stood in front of us, swaying and humming softly and sporadically. I could tell he wanted to sing along, but he didn’t know the words.

He looked Hispanic so I decided to be bold for once and ask him if he spoke Spanish. I’ve studied Spanish for close to five years now and have been anxious to use it outside of the classroom. He said he did and told me his name was Carlos. When I replied with mine, his face lit up as he explained that Jessica is his daughter’s name.

He went on to explain that he came from Ecuador in the nineties to ironically escape the poverty there. He came here with his wife, leaving his daughter behind who is now 17, married, and a mother of a baby boy. His wife later cheated on him with his friend, and they separated. Carlos expressed his confusion with his wife’s adultery: he had done nothing wrong to her. Now, he collects cans and bottles to get by and struggles with alcoholism. He was clearly drunk while I was talking to him, and I had trouble at times understanding him through mumbled words and uncontrollable drooling. He loved God and wanted to stop drinking for Him, but it was hard.

I handed out my first Spanish prayer card to Carlos. The card read:

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

Philippians 4:6,7

In times of struggle, I hope you find peace through God.

He read my card, kissed it, and said thank you.

It was difficult quelling any tendency to look at him through belittling eyes, and speak to him as an equal; we are all poor in our respective ways, but we tend to only realize poverty with something as tangible as wealth. Carlos’ story is sad, and I can easily say much more somber than my own. But is it? Isn’t the story of the rich man, who is apathetic toward God and seeks to control his own life just as sobering? We all need God, but it is impossible to find him through our own abilities. We can not thread ourselves through the eye of a needle; for man, this is impossible. Yet through the grace of God and His intricacies, the way in which he encourages both a young girl from a privileged background and a homeless immigrant through their conversation, or His use of seemingly insignificant moments, all things are possible.

Jessica

Resting in Him

2009-11-03T10:07:00.000-08:00

our journey..
This week in AHAV we went through a mock schedule run of how our future AHAV’s will be like. After a short training session we went over to Columbus circle to scope out the area, write note cards and make some cookie packages. As we walked to Columbus Circle we forgot to factor in the NYC marathon. With chaos all around, missing group members, and time running out we decided to just sit down on the floor in front of the shops at Columbus Circle and write our cards and make the packages. We were told twice to move by security guards (both outside the shops and inside the shop).

we had to keep on moving because we had no “place” where we could write and make packages it gave me a sense of what the homeless must feel. Where can the homeless find a place to just sit and find respite? They must constantly live in fear or have to be on guard. They not only not have no place to go but they also have to lug a big suitcase around with them everywhere they go. It made me realize only true respite can be found in God.

So after the whole Columbus circle run we went to open doors I focused my time on mainly 2 people. The first person I talked to was Alex. He recognized us and has been coming to open doors for the past 2 years. He previously belonged to the church of Jesus Christ. He recognized them as a cult and said that within the cult he lost his girlfriend to his best friend. Having been burned by “church” he said he just wasn’t ready to give it a try again. It saddened me to see that he was burned by the church and associated “Christians” with such hurt, but he said he knew how to get to heaven and if and when the time was right he will turn back to God. We talked a little about heaven and how it will be like one day when we enter. It was then I handed him a card with a verse about how to accept God as our savior.

The second person I talked to was Anne. Anne had just gotten into a fight with her dad and left his house. She was from Indiana and moved back to New York to be with her dad. Though she was angry with her father she knew that that’s how family is. You get angry with each other but in the end things will turn out fine. Anne was a Christian and was very active in her church, but since moving to New York she said there was just too many temptations and things that get her into trouble. Though we didn’t get into the details I could tell that Anne wanted to live a life for God and wanted badly to move away from the temptations of New York City. She said she was just waiting on some paper work and planned on returning to her family in Indiana. She asked that I pray for her and her family during the week and just for comfort. Sure enough one of the cards I had written was a message from me telling her I will pray for her during the week and a verse about rejoicing in God. God never ceases to amaze me even when it comes to having the “right” message on a card I had written for someone I hadn’t met yet.

Lord I ask that as we continue to serve in AHAV that the people we minister to realize they can only find rest in YOU alone.

In Him,
Gar

Suffering

2009-10-29T16:38:00.000-07:00

There have only been a handful of times in my life in which I have experienced true suffering. Let’s face it, for most of us these days if we’re suffering because we’re hungry we go get food. If we’re cold, we find a soft warm blanket. If we’re uncomfortable sitting or standing, we go home and lie in bed. If we’re lonely, we lean on our closest friendships. For most of us, our knowledge of suffering is limited to skipping a meal, or being cold standing outside for a few minutes. Living our daily lives, we often forget about the hundreds of people whose lives are marked with true hardships. We forget about all those who struggle on a daily basis to find a place to sleep or a meal to eat. They are hungry and thirsty, not only in the most physical sense but are also very much so spiritually.

For me, I have come to know the reality of Jesus’ love most intimately during the lowest and most difficult times of my life. Suffering has always been my blessing in disguise, because it is that moment when I need Jesus the most that He comes and brings me comfort and shows me true joy. I believe that’s the reason why I decided to serve in AHAV this year. Every day the poor in NY live lives of suffering. But they resort to drugs, alcohol, and the temporary things of this world to bring them a false sense of comfort.

This week, I had the chance to meet and talk with more and more people. As the weeks go by, I am finding it easier and easier to approach and open up to all those outside of Open Doors. Many appreciate the fact that we bring warm pizza, hot tea, and cold soda. Some others just cherish the opportunity to share their stories and open up their lives to us. I got to know Angie, who is waiting anxiously to renew her street vendor’s license so she could return to work. We prayed together that she would be able to get her license soon and that she would be able to work and get her life back on track. I also got to meet Salvador who had to leave his family and flee from his native Peru because of terrorist persecution and I prayed for him.

As I continue to serve in this ministry, I can’t help but wonder what it was like for Jesus to wander the land and walk through all the towns and villages healing the sick and associating Himself with the poor and broken in spirit. And as we continue to go out, I pray that the people we come in contact with can come to know that as difficult life may be His grace, love and mercy are enough to lighten their heaviest burdens.

In His love,

Andy

snapshots of AHAV

2009-10-27T17:42:00.000-07:00

"Therefore go and make disciples of a ll nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age."
Matthew 28:19-20

Grace Abundant

2009-10-25T19:40:00.000-07:00

God is good. Do you really believe it? That despite the thousands of homeless on the streets of New York City, despite the rampant poverty and hurting souls around us, despite our own pain and suffering, that God is good? It’s hard to say it, “despite horrendous injustices, despite utter despair and hopelessness, despite any circumstance, God is good.” Or rather it’s easy to say it.

We went out this past Sunday to the same location we’ve been going to, with the one difference being the weather. I found myself thinking about the biting wind and how I couldn’t feel my fingers anymore, before it hit me that there were men and women outside without any hope of respite from the elements. We brought sandwiches, soda (cold) and green tea (hot), in hopes of helping out with some of the physical needs of the homeless men and women we see every week. People gladly took sandwiches except for one man, who said he wanted to take one, but he had just partaken of KFC. I again offered, but he again politely let me know that he was already content.

His name was Mel, and I was shocked when he told me God has miraculously provided him with KFC. I mean God has done bigger things (check the Bible), but I was skeptical nonetheless. Mel, very openly, let us know about his struggles but also about his faith. He quoted scripture and the words of power rolled off his tongue smoothly. Mel explained that he loved Jesus and was filled with the spirit. Despite his stints in jail and other struggles, God has constantly been by his side. When he went to KFC a few hours before, he went without any money, but knew without any doubt, that God was going to give him chicken. That is why he was content, God had faithfully provided. This was the theme of his life- God had saved him from physical death and precarious situations miraculously, just like God had saved him from spiritual death. God is good.

I admit, it was extremely easy to doubt his stories, that he had fallen 80 feet from a platform but was saved by the angels of God or that God told him to leave a group of friends he was walking with right before they were shot to death. But I also realize that God is the same today as He is yesterday. He was good to Daniel’s friends in the fiery furnace and He was good to Joseph as a slave in Egypt. He is good to Mel and He is good to His other children on the streets.

As I serve in Ahav, I find that sometimes I search for rest in being warm or having a full stomach or in the praises of men. Often it is comfort that becomes a god in my life. But in working with the homeless, I see more and more that God’s love for those with nothing shines brilliantly. Jesus exclaims, “Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.”

Lord, I pray that we may find rest in You. Strip us of the idols we long for, and make us nothing that we may know Your love. We pray for the men and women on the streets of New York, that they may find your comfort in the midst of darkness. We acknowledge that You are good and Your grace is bountiful. Thank you.

Love in Christ,

Andrew

learning to stop

2009-10-19T15:38:00.001-07:00

Perhaps joining AHAV was an impulsive decision, made by someone new to the city, new to remnant and just looking for a place to serve. I'd even thought twice, thrice about serving; i knew no one in the ministry, the time commitment was challenging to say the least. Yet somehow in all my uncertainty I felt God's call and so I went, not knowing what to expect.

I had never done street evangelism in my life and so when sunday afternoon rolled around, I was extremely feaful. I remember just crying out to God in the prayer time that we had before going out onto the streets that God would just use me, though I felt so inadequate. Later at the shelter, after we'd finished giving out all the food, I'd also been at a loss on what to do next. But I think it's really in the midst of your insecurities, fears and shortcomings that God shows His strength and power the most as He overcame all that by far, providing an older sister for me to shadow and learn from and although I didnt say much in our conversations, it was a good start. I was amazed at how open people were, that really just they were people with hopes, dreams and failings just like us, even Christians like us as George, the person Victoria and I spoke to that sunday-- that we cannot help but feel for them even as they shared with us.

I think that weekend God taught me that sometimes we focus too much on ourselves, what we can or cannot do, what we've committed to or not that we forget to just look to Him and rest in His presence knowing that He was in control and that's enough. That sunday, I just felt God saying to me, rest and trust. And so even as I continue to set aside my time for AHAV and just give my best for Him and letting God do the rest, that's what I want to do.

in His love,
annabel

New Beginnings

2009-10-07T20:49:00.000-07:00

We shared thoughts. They shared their struggles. We shared prayers.

Everything went well, but something was amiss. I re- traced my words. “Be kind. Listen. Interact. Question. Share. Pray.” Where did I go wrong? I felt like each footstep was in the right direction so I asked myself once again, where did I go wrong? When one of my sisters asked me how I thought outreach went, I tried to put my finger on what felt out of place, but couldn’t find the right words. Was it because I’ve gotten too comfortable evangelizing?

Earlier that day, I was in pleasant shock to hear how amazingly missional-minded each and every single member of Ahav team was. Every heart desired to see God’s fruition here in New York City. We’ve all walked dutifully in line at one time or another with evangelism, speaking to our neighbor about the salvation of Christ. And yet, wonderfully and painfully enough, God opened my eyes to see a part of myself I did not necessarily want to see. I remembered Pastor Bruce’s words in a particular sermon focusing on the great similarities in spiritual depravity that exists in both the homeless and Christians alike. I didn’t pay too much mind to his words. I never really looked at the homeless as those without homes, but those spiritually homeless. How God humbled my heart to realize how much in similarity I was to those I spoke to that sunny afternoon!

I met a man named Louis who gave me the strong inclination of the word “self sustenance” as he spoke of his own strength in coming to a city void of familial bond. In my head I quietly reprimanded such ideals and called upon myself to pray for him later that night. Once I returned to my dorm however, God helped me realize how much Louis and I were alike. Who would’ve thought that the homeless and I could be alike spiritually? It was humbling to say the least, to see such ugly parts of me resonate in truth with the words of the homeless. I walked with each step in confidence as I looked to the cross, and yet, I walked right on past it, confident with the knowledge of my past endeavors with the homeless. Thank God for His ultimate intervention! How arrogant I was to so easily forget how universal sin is. Painful as it might be, Lord, reveal to us the weeds in our hearts so that we can be as effective as possible on the battlefields ahead. As one brother mentioned, cities have been called to be places of refuge, protection and rest. By all means, transform New York City and help us find refuge in you. For your namesake, Lord, work in our hearts and I pray that that change may radiate towards all those who come across us and hear the name of Christ proclaimed! What wonderful miracles may be ahead of us Lord? I am excited to see You change us.

Hopeful in the Lord,
Dahae

Surprised Hut

2009-05-16T20:32:00.000-07:00

The look of a surprised face is almost always a pleasant sight. I've had the fortunate pleasure to see friends surprised out of their wits on their birthdays. You see their eyes light up, their whole face just shines. Those are the memories that burst into your head and make you smile spontaneously just at the right moment; it comes when you really need it on a not so great day. Those are the memories that make you laugh out loud when you've never really intend to. However, there's one surprised face ingrained in my memory that's bittersweet.

Since the beginning of my spring semester, God placed in my heart a need to serve the homeless in my spare time. I rejected the idea for a long time coming, but there came a time when I could no longer put it off my plate. So, I filled my canteen with green tea, packed my bag with cups and granola bars and I left for Penn station. I wasn't expecting it to rain and was dismayed to see the rain fall as I exited the subway. Where would the homeless be? I was scared out of my wits. Out of the four homeless men I met that night, the one man's face I remember the most, the one man's name I pray for the most is Hut. He sat in a wheelchair and the people swarmed past him as if he was just a rock in a river, someone forever placed between the currents.

“Would you please give me some change?!” he said, in a voice that shocked me. I thought he was mentally unstable. He kept repeating those lines over and over again. No one gave him any eye contact.

“Sir, would you like some green tea?” I asked. And my heart melted right then and there. What I saw was something truly amazing. His face was so full of surprise; it was as if he was one of my memories. I offered him a cup of tea and he was speechless. On the corner of 34th and 8th I stood there and prayed for him out loud on the raining streets of New York and I praised God that I moved in obedience that night. It was bittersweet. How much generosity has this man ever been shown? In a city of multiple mega churches and strong fellowships, I walked wondering why he was so speechless and why my heart was so torn.

Ahav this spring semester sums up well into memories like these. I remember the faces of so many who've lit up because of generosity. Week by week I realize how great the exponentially limitless bounds of God's generosity truly is. What does it mean to love unconditionally? When I look into the eyes of the homeless, some dangerous, some drugged, some dirty, some unstable, some rude, some disagreeable, I realized how shallow my love has always been. Jesus broke bread for men and women like these. Would I have been a Pharisee frowning upon such actions? Yes, regrettably so. Being called to such services as he, bore in my heart a burden to share the love that rescued me and reminded me of the cross I've neglected to carry. When I touched the shoulder of a tattered man, smelled the odor of a tired woman, I was broken not only of my own inability but of God's great ability. This semester, we focused on evangelism and I was blessed to see seeds planted. Bibles were distributed, smiles were seen, jokes were given, prayers were spoken, but above all His gospel of salvation was preached. I saw hearts slowly lit. Not only were their eyes opened, but ours as well. Our helpless nature gave way to God's power manifesting within, reminding us that He is the ultimate healer, while we are simply the tools in between. Walking away a little helpless, I realized the blessing in realizing how much God needs to ultimately lead us.

Above all, I saw God's heart for New York and for the homeless. I leave with this-generosity is scarce. In a city blessed with so much the poor, the widowed, the orphaned and the fatherless receive no comfort. May they no longer be homeless; I pray they may find their home in You, Father. May they no longer be hungry, but find themselves satisfied in You. We were once orphans, but were given adoption into your family. Compel us and send your workers out. Revive our hearts. No longer shall we be blind to Your ways.

Dahae

Bruce Willis bought me a bottle!

2009-04-28T16:00:00.000-07:00

I mainly spent most of my time with one guy this past sunday. He was a new face and a relatively cheerful one as well, surprisingly.

One of my teammates asked him what we could pray for specifically and he said "forgiveness. we all need to learn to forgive each other you know what I'm saying?" (hah, when was the last time we ever prayed for that?) and after we were done praying I thought we (my teammate and I) would move on, but the guy started talking about random things to me and thus started my seemingly-hour long conversation with him.

Some interesting facts I discovered is that he had a job in private security for MSG (Madison Square Garden) and other places maybe? This would explain why he was new to me, he always worked on sundays. However, these past two sundays he was able to take the day off and went to church both times (Times Square Church). Even more surprising is that he's someone who has bounced back and got back up from the homeless world.

One interesting statement of his: "I learned to pick up my feet. You know all these people, or not even these people alone but also rich people too. They all fall down, we all are going to fall down. its going to happen to matter what. and some people don't know how to get back up you know? when I focus on something, I'm going to go after it. I'm not going to let no one or anything prevent me from chasing after it you know? I pray to God and I go for it and look what happened!"

And he tells me he's receiving housing in two more months and I ask him where. "Oh just right here [points to a tall building maybe like 5 streets away or so]. yeah you know its like right here, not too far. but I don't mind being around here you know, I'm used to this environment. this is where I grew up you know what I'm saying? I try not to get stuck on the bad things you know, I'm a cheerful guy. I like to have fun."

He then goes into how he has fun and what not... which is... yeah things I don't need to say haha. But he really lives it up haha. He told me one time bruce willis (or however you spell his name) asked him how he was doing and he answered with a line from one of his movies and bruce willis laughed and bought him a bottle of liquor. He also told me he's met most of the nba players which is kind of cool (we talked about the nba playoffs for a little, hah).

All in all I think the biggest thing I walked away thinking about is that because my teammate who was with me earlier said she didn't go to bars or clubs because she's focused on school, he was telling me that he understands that school's important and if thats your priority then go for it. but you got to have fun once in a while. what happens when school is taken away from you, or perhaps your job?

And I guess more applicable to us believers - What happens when we're too focused on worldly success - Can we also take time aside and spend it for God (in whatever form or shape this takes place in)? If all we're doing as college students is seeking good grades or whatever to land a job after graduation or if all we're doing as young professionals is seeking the moola or moving up that corporate ladder, then I think we're missing the focus. I could barely could carry a conversation with the guy since I had no experience in what he was talking about. not saying I want to go clubbing or bar-hopping anything, but does this mean I should completely reject any relevant knowledge about it? how can I talk about something and have a conversation with if I know nothing about the subject? and what do a majority of these people know a lot about? drugs, sex, violence (in general), sleeping on the streets, jail, broken families, cops, having no reliable friends, etc etc...

Time to get real and live it up a little (in the spiritual sense).

Answered Prayers

2009-04-16T18:31:00.000-07:00

I admit, I am one of very little faith. It’s pretty easy to have “faith” when you’re surrounded by a comfortable, encouraging body of believers. It’s quite another story to be thrown out into the world and expect the unexpected to happen. This week, God showed me just how pathetic my faith is and how good He is.

The Bible testifies in bright red letters that Jesus promises “whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours” (Mark 11:24). In our world today, I feel like the world general believes that miracles are a thing of the past and prayers are seldom clearly answered. At AHAV each week, we spend time standing in line getting to know these incredibly interesting and amazing people. We always ask if we can pray for them. Some always appreciate a blessing, some believe others need it more than they do, but mostly their prayer requests are usually simple and realistically human – a home, a job, warmer weather. Not too far off from my own.

For whatever reason, this week, God answered clearly. The Cincinnati missions team joined AHAV this week since we were a little short staffed. Deb Jung and I were talking with one couple, M & I, who told us their story of how they recently got married after falling in “love at first sight.”

We asked them what we could pray for and they replied, “Oh, you don’t even need to. Everything James prayed for last week, it came true! We thankful got into the transitional housing we’ve been waiting for and an apartment will be coming up soon!” I couldn’t believe it. I’ve encountered people at work who wait years for that. What a coincidence. We prayed and thanked God for His awesome works.

Then, I spotted one of my “favorites.” (I know we’re not supposed to have favorites, but if you met him, you’d understand). Rudy is at least 7 feet tall and tells us he used to play for the NY Knicks back in the 70s. When he’s in line, you know he’s there. But despite his towering appearance, he has this incredible ability to make you feel important and loved. Everyone in line knows he’s the nicest guy around, never curses, and stands at the front of the line reading Scripture each day.

Since Rudy no longer plays anymore, he joined a friend in starting up a sports packaging business (selling sports arena tickets + airfare + hotel). He told me this week that this friend happens to also be a street evangelist and how he wishes we could meet him since we’ve been ministering on the streets as well. He mentioned how the business wasn’t working out well since their office space has been too small and they need to move to a bigger office. When he asked for some prayer, I obviously obliged. We talked a bit more and I invited him to come play ball with our brothers after church one week.

Then suddenly, his eyes lit up and he started praising God. He couldn’t believe that just a few minutes ago he had hoped his friend could meet us, and there he was walking around the corner. Not only that, his friend told him that he had just come from signing a bigger office space for their business. I couldn’t believe it, and neither could Rudy. There God was answering prayers left and right. Maybe I ought to pray more…

Blessings,
Tiff

A Challenge

2009-04-08T18:20:00.000-07:00

After going to the Open Door every week, we’ve gotten to know the “regulars.”

- Sammy, a schizophrenic, who says the devil tells him every day that he can’t be saved because he keeps messing up every day.

- Rudy, a seven plus foot ex-NY Knick, who stands at the front of the line reading Scripture and is known to be the nicest guy around.

- Lynn, an avid reader, who can recommend the most interesting books and converse passionately for hours about literature.

Each person comes with such amazing stories, journeys, and experiences. And yet, each week, I leave that alleyway feeling unsettled. I don’t have a doubt in my mind where my next meal will come from or where I’ll sleep that rainy night. It’s been a harsh reality wake up call that life isn’t fair and there’s so little I can do to help those in need.

One conversation I had with “Bob” really shook me. As I introduced myself, he knew immediately that our group had come from a nearby church.

He asked, “Does your church have any kind of programs to help the poor and the oppressed?”
“Well, we’re a part of an outreach group that seeks to serve the community,” I answered.
“Do you serve food at your church?”
“No. But we’re here with cookies and hot chocolate.”
“What about the rest of the week?”
“No.”
"You know, one day, when I get my act together, I've got plans to go to the church and challenge them to use the position and power they have in this world to really make a difference. To really go out to the streets and do what Jesus would have done."
“Do you have any kind of plans to help those that are homeless to build affordable housing? You know, I heard that the government gives funds to churches to do that sort of thing. Does your church do that?”
“No.”

The questions continued and the answers remained the same. I started asking myself, What DOES our church do to answer the cries of those hurting in our own city? AHAV is a small step, but I’m still challenged to see how God is calling us to be light in a very dark city.

James 2:14-16
14What good is it, my brothers, if a man claims to have faith but has no deeds? Can such faith save him? 15Suppose a brother or sister is without clothes and daily food. 16If one of you says to him, "Go, I wish you well; keep warm and well fed," but does nothing about his physical needs, what good is it? 17In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead.

-Tiff

COFFEE!

2009-03-31T19:45:00.000-07:00

Last Sunday, March 29th, I had a lecture from a homeless folk. It went something along the lines of this: "Bring COFFEE (this is my attempt in internet language to imitate the way he said it) next time. we're all old you know what I'm saying? you see like... two 19 or 20 year olds here in this line, everyone else is all like in their 40's. we all drink COFFEE. we all need COFFEE you know what I'm saying? we don't drink no hot chocolate, we're not young. we drink COFFEE. COFFEE. we want some damn COFFEE." and he says the word "coffee" about five more times after that with a couple of pronouns and verbs here and there. That was entertaining, I guess.

I suppose older people prefer drinking coffee over hot chocolate. Also, I've never experienced such a demanding homeless man until last sunday (haha). but, this highlights how every week I'm able to listen and chat about new things with old or new faces. and... what do I want to blog about that I can remember? nothing really comes to mind.

I remember the same guy who really wanted his coffee came up to me later and says come over here for a second (we walk a bit away from the line). I'm like okay.. I'm thinking "I wonder if this is another lecture" in my mind haha. He points to a guy behind him in line and says "don't look, but you just see what he did? he cut in line, and no body even noticed. he cut in front of all those people who have been waiting for an hour or more, but thats how it is you know. thats how it is."

thats how it is eh? and I suppose that could be the reality of this world. we all cut corners, cheat, deceive or do shameful things and no body notices? I know I do this and I'm sure many other believers do as well (well, guess I can't really say that). And well, obviously God knows. Perhaps this is why I don't want to take the grace and mercy of God as a joke. or understate or minimize this grace. I pray for the grace of God upon all of us while we're in this harsh reality, and I would like to believe that God is so good that He'd extend it to all of us - homeless or not. we all needed it, need it, and will need it. lets desperately cry out for it and act like we're thankful for it.

"So how did you come to know the Word?" asks this different guy. Hah. I like how this is the first thing he says to my teammate. I don't even know how 50% of the people in my fellowship came to know Christ, and I guess I don't really have to know how, but should it be like that? I don't know. Perhaps its a sign when it takes months, sometimes years to know how a friend came to Christ, how their relationship with God is, what they're going through, etc. At least to me, perhaps I should just be like this guy and just get down to business. cut the chat. none of this stale talk. ask me how's God been moving in my life and let me tell you.

*poof*
Jason H

New Perspective

2009-03-27T19:47:00.001-07:00

God had been calling me to join AHAV for a long time, and I honestly found every excuse not to. I’m too busy with small group, I want to eat lunch with my friends after service, I don’t think I can handle it… when finally, I ran out of excuses. This is what Jesus would be doing if he were here today. Feeding the needy, loving the poor, NOT making my excuses. AHAV challenges me every week to recognize how limited and weak I am. It’s not in our human nature to be able to love people unconditionally without first understanding Christ’s love.

Working as a social worker in a hospital, I come across homeless individuals on a daily basis. For the most part, the patients I see are those that the doctors and nurses don’t know how to handle—the drug addict, the homeless guy, the abusive spouse, the family who’s about to lose a loved one. I had been nervous about joining AHAV because I didn’t think I could handle another day of “emotional intenseness,” but every week, I’m learning to hear God tell me to stop trusting in my own abilities and to start trusting in His infinite power. It’s given me the unique opportunity to work the same type of people in a very different light—one with a real hope and answer to the many messed up parts of this world.

All my experiences at work became so real when I met Damien this past week at AHAV. As I handed out cookies to the individuals at the end of the line, I offered one to a young teenage male at the back of the line. He looked up, slightly embarrassed, and whispered to me, “OH, I’m not homeless. I’m just trying to get some help.” It turned out that Damien had just gotten off a plane the day before from Detroit. He moved to NY and had been staying with his aunt, a Christian. When he had explained his story of “coming out” and finding out he is now HIV positive to his aunt, she told him that as a Christian, she couldn’t approve of his lifestyle choice as a homosexual. He packed his bags and hit the streets, hoping to find a more supportive community. A few people on the street told him he could get housing help at the Open Door.

My initial reaction as a social worker was to provide him with information about all the numerous programs and services available to him (including the Covenant House) in NYC. But after further conversation, I realized God had strategically placed me for this divine opportunity to speak with him not only to assist him with services, but also to express God’s love for him, despite his choices. It shocked him that Christians would both serve the community so willingly and accept him for who he is. We sent him off to Covenant House to hopefully get housing for the night and provided him with information about RWC.
I realized that I often get so caught up in needing to preach the gospel that I forget God works even in our small encounters and faithful conversations. How do I love your people like you would, God?

Please pray that our team will continue to have open hearts and eyes to love those that we encounter. Pray for divine opportunities to minister to those at the Open Door.

Blessings,
Tiff

#29

2009-03-23T11:14:00.000-07:00

3.22.09

Items we brought: Approx. 50-70 Chocolate Chip/Oatmeal Cookies, 2 Full Can Bottles of Hot Chocolate and 1 Hot Coffee.
Task: Go out to open doors in front of the homeless shelter, hand out cookies, beverages, and pray for them.

Comment:

Today, I learned how to slaughter a chicken from a man name David. He talked to me about how his father from down south Virginia used to grow chicken, cattles, pigs, fruits, and vegetables in his land. They never had to go to the super market unless you wanted to buy sugar, salt, and pepper... that sort of stuff. He taught me how to can(preserve) fruits and vegetables after you grew them in the field. He told me how rich and good they tasted.

I spoke to David for at least about an hour while the weather was getting cold below 40s. As he spoke to me about these good tasting natural/organic food, I became hungry and cold. My feet start hurting because I was standing so long listening to him.

Number 29. People line up on the side of the building waiting for the dinner tickets, which only 29 of them get. After the 29th tickets gets handed out, the 30th person on the line needs to find their own food for the evening.

While talking with David, I was hungry. I wanted food. I didn't know how much cash I had in my pocket, but if that was the only money I had besides my bank accounts and maybe some family help, I would be in serious trouble. I would need to come to this line hoping that I would be within the first 29th person on line.

Ahav totally opened my eyes. God opened my eyes to my community and the world that I live in.

I'm still learning about what God wants to say to me. Until then.. peace.

"We live under the same sky but share different horizons"

Compassion

2009-03-22T00:23:00.000-07:00

What love could cause physical pain to the bearer? What kind of hunger and heartache could cause weeping to the unexpecting? So many times I have heard that God's love is infinite, resolute, and powerful beyond measure; these are expressions I have found comfort in in many trials. But, on a day to day basis, the rush of daily life dulls away the magnitude of a love synonymous to such irresistibly incomprehensible words.

I had no idea what was going on. Pastor Kyu had come to pray over me sensing the presence of God nearby. Have you ever had a Charlie horse? It's an intense muscle cramping. I thought I was going insane as my whole body started to cease up. For some I hear it's like giving birth. The floodgates opened and oh, how it broke mine to hold on to such sadness. My body temperature continued to rise and rise as I started to shake. How much he wanted his children to embrace Him I cannot explain. Weeping was not enough to bear such love. And so, all I could do was to pray, to intercede on their behalf, of the children he moved me to pray for. Such agony for people I did not talk to was one of the first prayers where God moved my heart closer to His.

Today, He has acted again, placing a strong conviction within me. I met a girl today named Jessica as we distributed drinks at Open Door, a 24 hour drop in center for the homeless. Although there were quite a few people, for some reason, my attention went right to her. She seemed shy and to herself, but as I talked to her, I sensed the condition of her heart; She was tired beyond anything I've ever felt. Moved and burdened, I offered her a prayer and said my farewell. But, as I prayed with Ahav, uncontrollable weeping took hold as God showed me his heart for the lost children of New York, specifically the homeless. He had told me she was looking for Him in all the wrong places and became broken little by little at every disappointment she encountered. How much He was pained to see His daughter Jessica to be in so much turmoil. I must've looked insane just bursting into tears, but I felt dizzy with yearning as God opened my eyes to His heart.

I am not a person who is inclined to pray. Yes, it's self confidence issue, but I'm one of those people who hate being called on to pray for everyone. When I was given the gift of compassion, I was shocked that it moved me to pray in a fervor I would not experience with my own self-made compassion or love. But, this love, this ridiculously powerful, "I don't even get this", too beautiful to describe, awesome love is beyond all wonders. And, this love for His people was never something I understood until it became tangible. I shake my head at such weak faith...

Let us intercede on their behalf. Although we are small in number, I find God really calling us to live the love. As we sit together, I find ourselves moving closer to the heart of God through prayer. I find it so encouraging that as the church moves forward in prayer, Ahav follows suit.

This God of ours is weeping for His lost Children. Revival, come forth.

Dahae

Spring 2009- What's changed?

2009-03-21T23:49:00.000-07:00

In comparison to Fall 2008 semester, Ahav has taken on many changes. At Covenant House, we focused on creating relationships that reflected the love of God, a worthy goal. However, since Fall 2008, the Spring 2009 Ahav team has taken on new challenges. Setting aside Covenant House, we have begun the semester with more evangelistic methods. For the first month, we handed out Praise Night flyers with the Remnant Westside Church bulletin near Port Authority/Times Square. Personally, it has not been an easy road. I found myself wondering whether the passerby accepted the flyer on account of God or the chocolate chip cookie we handed out with it. However, as that month slowly came to a close, I was reminded once again of the necessity of trust. From 11 volunteers from last semester, we drew an even four. Seeing the change in between, I constantly asked God what He was planning to do. However, slowly but surely, I saw God come work within us. During that first month, He helped re-align our eyes to His essential calling. We weren't going to search for numbers, for the maximum amount of fruit, but rather, follow in obedience his commission in teaching of the sacrifice of Jesus by going and speaking the truth. A rather elemental and fundamental fact and yet, I stumbled many times in that first month, frustrated by the apparent lack of visible fruit.

One week in particular, I remember a woman stranded at Port Authority. Her purse had been stolen. Everything of value, her wallet, her credit cards, her cell phone, was gone. On the verge of tears, she came forward and asked if we could help her "pan-handle" with her. We, (Jose and I) seemed like relatively normal, young people, she said. I found this a bit odd, and yet, God used this opportunity to bring about His glory. As Jose spoke of the gospel, I began to pray and I found the Spirit stirring within us. Praise be to God.

Our second month, we've focused on Open Door, a 24 hour emergency drop in center for the homeless. We set off after a session of prayer providing cookies and drinks, whether it'd be hot chocolate, Gatorade, etc. Whether we offer our prayers or ask a simple "How are you?" I hear God calling us to be bolder in our obedience. As of late, I feel God calling Ahav to speak the gospel with confidence. There is movement. Something is stirring within the city and within the church. Let us live everyday in the fullest for His Name.

Dahae

December 21, 2008

2008-12-31T06:23:00.001-08:00

It was already our last Sunday of Ahav and on this day the Covenant House team joined with the Mother/Child group at their site. We split into two groups-- the minors and mother/children-- in which I was with the mother and children. The mothers that came mentioned that they were planning to take a trip to Toys R Us so they wouldn’t be able to stick around for the activities. We shared pizza and rounds of playing Pig with the mothers along with candy being the gift prizes. Though we ran out of prizes the mothers willingly wanted to stay to play more and I was so happy to see them enjoying themselves with smiles on their faces. We ended by praying blessings over the mothers and their children and thankful that we could be part of their lives.

As we ended on that note we had time of debriefing for this past semester. As I reflect back on my experiences at Ahav I realized how physically limited I am and how much I’m in need of God’s grace. I felt like my “spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak.” I came into Ahav with the notion that I had something to offer and wanted to share it with the people at the Cov but as we went to our site every Sunday I realized more and more that really I had nothing to give neither was there anything I can do in my own power except to leave it up to God’s hands and I’m here to serve.

My hope is that I wouldn’t forget the experiences of learning what it means to die to myself and remembering that there are more than one ways to love people-- one of them being just meeting people where they are and “being” with them.

-Helen

December 14, 2008

2008-12-15T20:07:00.000-08:00

This Sunday, being my last weekend at Ahav, was a time of reflection. Initially, I didn’t know what to really expect from Ahav but felt convicted to serve in some way. I am fairly new to religion and faith, and I felt Ahav would be a non-imposing way to serve. Throughout the term, there were times of frustration when admittedly, I wasn’t sure what I was doing there nor did I really find myself connecting with these kids who I saw once or twice, save for a few. I found myself learning more from these kids than anything. It was both humbling and inspiring to see them so full of character and strength and most of them seem to have such a healthy, confident outlook on life, even in their circumstances. I have volunteered a handful of times prior to this and always found it to be a rewarding experience. Ahav was different. Results-driven, goal-oriented, I found it personally challenging to go there every Sunday for 2-3 hours to try to get to know these kids on a personal level in a setting that seemed fairly unstructured. There was no regularity in attendance nor in conversations. I’ve questioned my purpose here many times but was led to just remain in faith. What I’ve come to realize is that I am here to serve God, to do His will and not my own, and “just be-ing” there makes a difference, whether it is visible or not. I was touched by fellow Ahav members every week as I saw them reaching out to these kids, more effectively than myself. It was obvious that the heart to serve and to advance God’s kingdom could only come from God and seeing that in peers around me was spiritually enhancing.

One girl who I did have any connection with was Nina. She attended every Sunday. A few times when I got to talk to her one on one, she opened up to me with her personal life, her clinical depression, bipolarity, self-mutilation, relationship with her boyfriend, etc. It made me feel uncomfortable. While I wanted to help her, I didn’t want to be overstepping and really, I didn’t know what to say or how to help her. But I just wanted her to know that if she needed anybody to talk to her, I would be there. I found out she left for another place. I didn’t get to have any last words with her but at least, I hope to stay in touch with her via email.

-Audrie

December 7, 2008

2008-12-10T21:12:00.000-08:00

Sitting at a table of three, we respectfully pummeled each other as best we could in a competitive spin on a game called “never have I ever”, taking advantage of obvious differences in piercings, kicks and, to my possibly very un-pc advantage, places of residency. Never have I ever lived at the Covenant House. They couldn’t say the same. But they did have some singularity over me, with obvious cultural and gender differences in hair cuts and age differences like the fact that they were still in high school and I wasn’t anymore. Some of their statements were really personal and really heart-breaking. One of them said never had he ever seen or talked to his dad nor did he ever want to for that matter. The other said he stopped talking to his dad for years because he was being abused and he never wanted to see him again.

It reminded me of a message I heard about fathers, which I repeated to them. I said, I didn’t know if they believed in God, but I once heard a message that God is so great and mighty, and yet He desires to take the role of a Father, to show His nearness to us. Since Satan knows that our earthly fathers are symbolic of our Heavenly Father, he strikes our relationships with our fathers to distort our image of our perfect Heavenly Father. Because God showed His forgiveness and love to all of us through Christ, we can understand the perfect love of our Heavenly Father and with that love be able to forgive our earthly fathers.

One of them said, “that’s deep.” That’s when I found out they both believed in God and have gone to church and desired to go back. What a huge encouragement and blessing that was to me. In the weeks prior, I had been sharing the gospel and singing worship songs with them while they had blank or distracted faces, and in my insecurity feared that they were offended or disinterested. But now I know that every time I timidly spoke about this beautiful story of salvation, they were sharing this faith with me in their hearts.

Pressing through my own fears and doubts as I strive to voice and live out the gospel in new contexts, I am learning to not be “ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes” Romans 1:16. Meeting many youth like these who are practically fatherless, and who have an ever-growing mix of reactions and convictions in the midst of their circumstances, I am beginning to feel the ache of God who cares for their justice and the urgency of the battle as God works in all things to turn our hearts back to Him.

-Cheryl

November 23, 3008

2008-11-28T12:52:00.000-08:00

Today was unlike any other Sunday we spend at the 41st St. Covenant House. Rather than setting up our workshop stations and waiting for the guys and girls to come downstairs to join our stations everyone that came to the lounge naturally gravitated towards one big table like one big family. I was delighted to see the people that came out to the Soul Food event couple Sunday ago-- Ronda, Nina and Kiesha just to name a few. We immediately started off with a game of Mafia which quickly turned into an exciting guessing game of who the "mafia" was. As more and more people came trickling into the lounge the game drew them in and soon the group was 15 people large. Three rounds of Mafia later we decided to move onto a game of Spoons. In between our transition from Mafia to Spoons I got a chance to briefly speak with Manuel. He seemed to know that we were from church since he asked if we were from RWC. I told him that we were and asked if he'd like to come to church with us on Sunday which he was open to coming.

Even though the day didn't go according to schedule and didn't have deep conversations with people, I believe God still used that time of playing Mafia to "just be" with them and meet them where they are. As we enter into our "second semester" of serving in Ahav I continue to be challenged that there's no limit with God and He can use any circumstance and any one as long as there's a heart of obedience and a desire to chase after the things of His heart.

Similarly to John I'm also a person who's attracted to comfort and hang around people that I'm comfortable with but as I continue to serve with my brothers and sisters every Sunday I get encouraged whenever I see them putting themselves out there. I'm also reminded that Jesus was not "picky" when it came to who He chose to hang out with or minister to. He loved and still loves us all. I hope that as we spend the next couple of months at the Cov. that we'll continue to reflect Christ's love and that the guys/girls at the Cov. come join us in worship at RWC!

- Helen

Soul Food

2008-11-20T14:40:00.003-08:00

This past Sunday was a break from our regularly scheduled programming at the Cov. Instead of our usual workshops, games, and conversations, we had our special 'Soul Food' event. The event was primarily for the youth to experience the love of Christ through the food, games, special performances, and interactions with volunteers.

With that purpose in mind, the first thing we tried to do was honor the event name. So we used the time and money that was available to us to purchase...Popeye's! Although it wasn't real soul food, the youth (and volunteers) really enjoyed and appreciated it. Honestly, who doesn't like Popeye's? Crispy chicken, buttery biscuits, palatable potatoes....nothing like good food to spark some good fellowship.

Then we had Shauna, Dan, Anna, Minnow, and Carol/Lisa/Sharon/Lyn use their talents to convey the gospel message. Mostly songs, but we had a dance ensemble as well (with some nice gospel music!). And the performances were great, as usual, capturing the attention of everyone there, garnering some 'holla!'s and some 'sing it girl!'s from the crowd. But beyond the talents, I pray that the lyrics and the brief testimonies of the performers stuck with everyone who was there to hear, for some kind of seed to be planted.

The final component to our event was our very own RWC volunteers coming out to help the AHAV team set up and just engage with the people who came. It was a blessing to see everyone come out, to see a slice of the body of Christ come together to bless the youth. Hopefully, through serving food, hearing about their lives, and sharing from our own, our goal of sharing the love of Christ was realized.

Three people expressed interest in coming to church this Sunday, so I and hopefully, some AHAVers will go to the Cov and see if they really want to come.

I am a person that gravitates towards comfort. And I have become too comfortable with ministry, church, small group, and all those "Christian" things. So personally, it's been a blessing to be a part of AHAV because AHAV challenges me to think about what it really means to love people. What does it mean for someone who comes to the Cov once a week to love another person with whom he has nothing in common? It's a good question because I think the answer goes beyond the Cov. It applies to work, school, small group, family, friends, strangers...

- John Park

November 9, 2008

2008-11-20T14:40:00.001-08:00

Today, I was struck again by the unpredictability of the ministry and how God is really working. Some of the tenants (all of the minors and some of the mothers) are only at the site for a maximum of thirty days before being transferred, so it’s sometimes hard to build relationships with people if you don’t know if this week will be the last time that you’ll ever see them. However, this week, I was more aware of how the relationship building has really made a difference. During these past few months at Ahav, I’d been working with the minors , many of them had been coming on a regular basis, but this week none of them came, so I got to experience what was happening on the other side of the room.

This week we were fewer in number and so were the mothers. Only four mothers and their children came total, and there were only three of us, so it was a more intimate setting. Three of the mothers were regulars that had gotten used to us coming. For part of the time, I watched over the kids so the mothers wouldn’t be so distracted, but I heard from my teammates that the mothers were a lot more open this week than ever before. They really started to open up about their struggles with finding permanent housing, and the whole system, problems with their kids, etc.

As a team, we’d like it if people would pray for us to be more open in sharing personally and sharing about the gospel. After all, sharing the gospel and tending to their spiritual needs is what makes us different from any other humanitarian who took pity on these people. Pray that we will always be bold for God! Pray that we’d have God’s discernment and wisdom for what to do in various situations.

We thank God for all that he’s done to open the hearts of these young women already.

-Krista

November 2, 2008

2008-11-19T19:49:00.000-08:00

I have been struck by the vulnerability and openness of the youth at Covenant House. Many of them simply want someone to listen to their story and to their dreams. And they have so many dreams! I am encouraged and delighted when I hear of their goals and their visions for their lives.

As we talk and learn more about each other, I hear glimpses of their past and the paths that have led them to this shelter. Even when it is not blatantly expressed, there is a rawness and quality of pain or something more that cannot be hidden. I struggle with my own timidity and how to love them the few hours that we have with them. Sometimes I just want to scoop them up and hug them really tight. You are loved. God is love. But it’s never really that simple.

Yet none of us are very different in that way—in our need of God’s love, of Christ’s healing. Perhaps my heart hurts because it recognizes in their revelations a familiar pain and heartache that only Christ can reach and restore. Please pray!—that we will ultimately point them toward Christ and that He will be their hope and salvation.

And who knows how God is working—they say the kingdom of God is like when “a man scatters seed on the ground. Night and day, whether he sleeps or gets up, the seed sprouts and grows, though he does not know how” (Mark 8:26-27).

I lead a time management workshop that helps determine priorities and the parts of life that are truly important to you. Because the exercise is so personal, each and every group I meet with reacts differently to the workshop. It resonates for some and simply doesn’t for others. At our second time at Covenant House, my group had suddenly grown from 3 people to a table full of 18 and 19-year old boys. It was hectic and hard to run a meaningful workshop and get to know each person at the table.

This past Sunday, one of the youth from that very workshop returned to AHAV for the first time since that day. Besides reminding me that (at 22 years old) I was “not that young,” he proudly showed me his new work ID and told me that he had used some of the stuff from the workshop! Though we do not know how, God makes things grow.

-Christine

October 26, 2008

2008-11-04T13:13:00.000-08:00

Over the past few weeks we've been at the Covenant House Mother/Child unit, we've been able to spend time with the moms during our workshops. My favorite part has been the time at the end when we get to just talk. Not only do I get a chance to get my hands on those oh-so-adorable children, but we've been able to get to know the moms. From not so deep topics like where they're getting their hair done this week and what movie they're excited to watch, to more substantial conversations and prayer requests about their housing situation, we've been able to get a bigger picture of who they are rather than just a young mother.

I wish I could say that I've totally connected with the moms during our conversations, our workshops have been flawless, or that I've given 100% of my energy during our time there. But the fact of the matter is that I have no personal experience with raising a child, we've seen a few yawns and blank stares during our workshops, and there are days I'm just tired. With these discouraging thoughts, I think it's been easy for me to let myself get task oriented, and start thinking about what I'm doing wrong. But I'm reminded of the things that have been a blessing during my time with AHAV: seeing how as a Church we can gather together every Sunday and actively respond out of an overflow from Christ. By going out into our community and immersing ourselves into the needs and issues that are there, it's given me a picture of how God can and is using the Church. Even though I feel like I might not be doing much, I'm learning how God just asks that we be obedient and go. It's been challenging at times, but I'm learning what it means to use our time and resources we've been blessed with not just for ourselves, but to actively love others around us.

-Sunny

October 19, 2008

2008-10-23T18:36:00.000-07:00

After the 1st week going to the 41st St. Covenant House, my thoughts about how I could connect with the guys and girls I just met there, continued throughout my mind during the week. Wishing to see the same faces in our second week, I instead saw new fresh faces. (Praise the Lord! I truly am thankful!)

Sitting down with the few girls that attended my "Good Communication" workshop, again it surprised me because I honestly did not know what I could give them. I grew up as a Christian, was taught to be polite, courteous, friendly, have a big smile, do the right things, etc. And here I was sitting with people asking what I could teach them about communication. These girls grew up from different places, under difficult circumstances, and each had attainable goals and high dreams of a better life for themselves, i.e. college, a new job, fashion designer, pharmacist, and rapper.

My workshop was very simple yet deep, helping everyone, even me, to see where and how each of us could improve our communication with others. We immediately went into politics, the presidential candidates, job situations, religion, food, movies we enjoy and those that scare us. And of course how healthy and tasty the Kashi cookies were and jokingly threw around how much we could make selling to other residents.

All in all, I saw Jesus really humble me and how if I let Him move my heart, He can use anyone to really build true friendship and touch anyone's heart. Thinking that I could bring them something, a solution to their problems, me being educated, or having a job did not and could not reach them but it was the love of Christ that reached them. I saw these girls as sisters who were just like me, in need of Jesus' love and touch. What really sparked their minds was when they asked me why I was there at Covenant House. What a chance! It was a joy sharing about RWC and the church ministry, my testimony and how God knew their needs, their strengths, weaknesses, and how much He really loved them.

I count it pure joy serving the youth at Covenant House, because it was another chance for me to see God move in His mysterious way in His own and perfect timing.

"If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing." – 1 Corinthians 13:1-3

-Jeffrey

First Outreach of the Semester

2008-10-16T21:10:00.000-07:00

This week's outreach was the first of the semester, and also my first outreach experience through Ahav. It wasn't what I expected, but at the same time I had no idea what to expect. A good number of us had just returned from retreat that morning. I was running on a few hours of sleep, somewhat more delirious than functional, but still excited to go to Covenant House for the first time. I know I probably wasn't the only one.

Six of the minors came to the workshop that day. We introduced ourselves and they told us their names, which led into a discussion about tag/street names. Originally, we had planned to give workshops geared towards the women in the mother-child program, but this slight change of plans didn't throw us off too much. Because we were running short on time, we went straight into playing a game of charades.

Quite a few personalities were present on Sunday. We had wonderfully out-going Greg and Monday, and then Star, who was incredibly shy. Fortunately there's nothing like a goofy game of charades to break the ice and even Star volunteered herself to act out the tie-breaker. It was a close game, and we had a lot of good laughs about it.

When we finished one game, Monday said, "Let's play again!" Although we didn't have time to play another round, it really warmed my heart to hear her say that. I felt comfort in knowing that next week, there will be another game, and the week after that. Maybe we won't play charades, but either way I'm looking forward to it!

-Janet

Sept 7, 2008 Mother and Child Event

2008-09-13T23:45:00.000-07:00

I really hope that the mothers felt loved. In the name of Christ, we threw them a 3-course meal (which I'm so thankful went well!), took care of their kids with fun bubbles and coloring, had a special presentation, live background music, photobooth, activities, prizes, and dancing. As the team members and myself were planning for this event, we strongly felt that the event should be focused on having them experience the joy that comes from God as He turns their mourning into dancing and their beauty into ashes, as Isaiah 61 promises in Christ. Eat, they did. Talk, they did. Laugh, they did. Dance, they did (with some coaxing *grin). Several people, including a staff member, expressed interested in coming to church. Conversations that I don't even know about happened amongst them and the awesome volunteers. Not only were they touched, I think I saw the volunteers' hearts and eyes opening in loving people they never would have conversed with before. I saw tiny seeds of love being planted into the mothers' hearts. I pray that they would only grow and blossom. That wherever they go, they would experience the hand of a loving Father over them because... ""The Spirit of the Sovereign LORD is on me, because the LORD has anointed me to preach good news to the poor. He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners, to proclaim the year of the LORD's favor and the day of vengeance of our God, to comfort all who mourn, and provide for those who grieve in Zion— to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair." (Isaiah 61)

-Julia

Mamas and Babies

This past Sunday I had an amazing opportunity to volunteer serving the young, single mothers through an event called "Beauty for Ashes" which was organized by our church's AHAV ministry. I was so captured by the vision of the event which was to pamper these young, mostly single women and their children with a lovely evening of dinner, dancing and photos of them and their kids to show how special they are and that they're loved by God. I honestly didn't know what to expect other than that I really wanted to see God move and that I really wanted to be part of that.

At my table I had three young mothers who just moved into the Covenant House less than a week ago with their children. I was pretty nervous talking with them cause they were kind of shy but when asked about their kids their faces lit up and shared endless stories of them with proud voices. At times I'd forget that they're teenagers but when it came time to dance, which was one of the activities, their youthful soul came out and showed that they still got their groove. I think the women really appreciated that time cause it seemed like they don't get many chances to have fun like that.

One of the moms at my table shared about her experience with church. She stopped going cause she got into a fight with a friend. She misses going to church cause she loves gospel music but at the same time she disliked how it made her cry. It reminds her of the hard times she's going through. I told her maybe it's not so bad that she cries cause it could be God speaking to your heart and He wants to take all that pain away. She just shook her head. I didn't know what to say except inside I was praying that God would show her His hope and that whatever hard times she went through that He knows.

I think the women and children got to experience a glimpse of God's love for them. It was a joy to laugh and dance TOGETHER with them. It's not just them who needs His touch but even we who do believe in Him need to be reminded of His love, joy and hope. I don't know what the future lies ahead of them and it's kind of discouraging thinking about the possibilities of what may happen to them but there definitely is hope and anything is possible with Him.

-Helen Shim

September 7, 2008

2008-09-13T23:43:00.000-07:00

As the summer ends and the air adopts a breezy chill, so comes the end of our Ahav commitment for the summer. We have one more week before it's really over but there was a certain sense of finality as Ahav held two special events to celebrate what was a summer of interesting, trying, maturing, and beautiful things.

One event occurred at the Covenant House mother and child program where Julia Lee, Alison Chen, Jane Jeong, Cheryl Chin and their awesome RWC volunteers hosted a sort of celebration night for the young women and their children that they became close with throughout the summer. Tales of joy escaped their update e-mails to the rest of the team as they spoke of good times through food, fun, laughter, and dancing. The night seemed to be a resounding success but it did not seem it could be anything but as they shared with the rest of the Ahav team of how great their experiences were week after week. What else could we expect from such continued enthusiasm throughout the summer?

The other event took place at the Covenant House on 41st street where we have had two concurring arts programs this past summer on the "Crisis" floors where young people from ages 17 to 21 sought refuge from poverty and homelessness seeking some sort of hope and normality in their lives. The event occurred in a lounge on the first floor where beautiful decorations were arranged by Lydia Kim and her awesome RWC volunteers. Eric Huh took care of the food preparations where more volunteers heeded the call to serve. Dan Fu was relentless in making sure that all of our loose ends were tied up with more food and event supplies. Albert Chung played bouncer and got to know some of the newer guys to Covenant House. Sara Choi provided support where it was needed while Yvonne Lao helped me emcee for the night. The point of this event was to serve the people that we met and learned to love through our few months at "The Cove." It wasn't always easy and it wasn't always fun but we all knew that it wasn't about any of those things. It wasn't about how much enjoyment we could have or how much we could do with our own humanly produced efforts but rather how much could be done despite them.

At our event, we felt God bring tears to eyes and crack open rocks for hearts as Pui Liu offered her testimony as proof of God's providence and habit of redemption. We witnessed God induce high wattage smiles, reverberant laughter, and a heartfelt appreciation for those who partook in the open mic sesion of the night who were all from the Cove. This event wasn't something part of their ordinary schedule nor was it expected. I believe almost every member of Ahav has been asked by the Cove youth why we would host this event. Why would we come here every Sunday when everyone else is trying to get out. Why were we trying to provide outlets of expression and discussion when everything else seemed so bland and dull. They assume that we are paid implying that even handouts aren't free anymore and that no one really cares about them. I guess it'd be quite convenient to point upwards and say God was the reason for our being there. What other answer is there? We are a church sponsored ministry, no?

As we left the Cove, one of the youths was outside and we were exchanging good-bye handshakes when he asked, "When are you guys gonna be back? Next week, right?" To which we responded, "Yeah, we'll be here next week." The answer seemed so appropriate and normal. We've been saying that we'd be back "next week" for the past twelve or so Sundays. What else could be different? But in the back of my mind, I knew that once the next Sunday came, we would not have that answer so readily available. What would we answer once next week came? Our commitment would be over. The summer would be gone. The fall would be here soon enough and the leaves would announce it's arrival. I'm still contemplating whether or not if I'll be able to say that I'd be here again to offer a "next week," but I do know that Remnant Westside Church is filled with people who could.

This summer I've had many thoughts and questioned the purpose of Ahav and I posed the same queries that the Cove youth would ask to myself. Amongst other things I guess I realized I used to point upward and say that God was the inspiration behind any community service I could produce but I've been learning to point heartward and realize that God isn't so far away.

Paul Lee

August 31, 2008

2008-08-31T19:44:00.001-07:00

... And they shall dream dreams.
I met a young woman today at the Mother/Child shelter that we go to every week. She has a newborn 1-month old. At the end of our "Interview/Resume" workshop that Alison led, Alison made a comment that we were from a Christian church nearby. To which this young woman commented that she was thinking of becoming a Christian soon. I asked her why and this is what she told me...

When she was in Jamaica (recently came to the States), she started having these crazy, vivid dreams with God in them... she turned away from her "bad" ways and gave her life to God after this one dream she had. She said that she has dreams sometimes with evil spirits/demons and a Christian woman who starts cursing these demons in God's name and they flee. She also stated that she has dreams that would actually come true- for example, she had a dream that a "war" was happening her village and it actually did. She shared some other crazy stuff that I don't remember and don't know how to describe in words. But as I intensely looked into her eyes while she was nursing her baby and sharing her stories, I didn't see any guile or over-exaggeration. She then stated that she's waiting to make her full decision to become a Christian because she wants to fully believe and commit before saying "yes". She said that once she makes that step of faith and commitment, she believes that God'll do amazing things. I believed what she said to be sincere and I was in awe of God's hands and fingerprints in her life... from Jamaica to here.

It was a blessing to hear her story because it reminded me of stories of people coming to Christ through dreams in Muslim countries where Christians are persecuted. But standing before me was a woman whom God met through supernatural means that I only read in books about. I just hope and pray that she makes that step to follow Christ.

Julia

August 17, 2008

2008-08-27T10:00:00.000-07:00

Ahav has been a great experience this summer, especially the Covenant House at 41st. I have met lots of great guys who are at a crossroads in their life. Lots of them have told me about how life has been tough and challenges they have faced such as prison, finding a job, and school.

I think through the experience, God has been reminding me of his heart
for people. I'm also reminded that we are all the same and that God truly is the one who looks after his children.
I think I've also been inpsired by their love of family and friends. It reminds me of the best parts of humanity.

There were times this summer when things were awkward and felt strange but recently God has really allowed us to build strong relationships even though they may be passing and brief in nature. All small positive interactions can help to build a stronger foundation for these young guys.

Not sure how long this is supposed to be but im really thankful to God for everyone I've met and for anyone reading this, I encourage you to join Ahav.

Daniel C. Fu

August 10, 2008

2008-08-15T05:45:00.001-07:00

If I don't see her again, I'm going to miss her quiet strength and her 10 month old Tarzan of a son! I'll never forget the time when this little infant leapt into my arms from hers the second he saw me. I'll never forget the persistence she had during GED training and her uplifted hands and shout of joy when she worked out a math problem.

This woman is from the mother child program we work with every Sunday and God placed her on my heart when I met her. Then, one week she was the only one who said she was interested in coming to our service. Then she was the only one who came this past Sunday, all dressed up in white with her hair up and saying her son would still have been dressed up too if he hadn't dirtied himself with food.

I found out her baby's father passed away when she was 5 months expecting. Our speaker this Sunday reminded her of her pastor back home-I found out she used to go to church! She liked service and says she will come back and she wants to bring her mom too. She's moving out on her own this week and waiting on a potential job to take care of babies. Even with everything she's been through, she rejoiced with us in God's provision and goodness and knows Jesus loves her.

I don't know how it happened, but my heart is just filled with joy over her and her son and how God's been working in her family. I know my part in her walk with God has been small so far. But perhaps this is some of what Paul felt towards the Thessalonians whom he had intense longing to see and of whom he said "Indeed, you are our glory and joy" (1 Thessalonians 2:20).

I'm learning that what matters in this ministry is not the experiences and encounters we have, but how God is impressing His desires onto our hearts and changing us. What a joy it's been to attempt to follow His commission and experience His promise that He is always with us in this purpose of making genuine, enduring, faithful disciples of all nations.

I hope and pray she will come back to our service after this week like she said she would, and bring her mother along as intended.

-Cheryl

August 3, 2008

2008-08-06T18:15:00.000-07:00

This past Sunday I was placed to my usual location, which was the covenant house on the girl's floor. It's been about 9 weeks now since I've been serving within this ministry. The first couple of weeks were when I was trying to adjust to something that totally took me out of my comfort zone. I use to be a person that could care less about the people in this world. But God has placed me in a challenge to learn how to put myself before others. I honestly can say it was pretty tough and frustrating, and it felt like I could never help anyone no matter how much I tried to serve the people he placed in my life. But I learned that I got frustrated and impatient because I wanted to see the growth in the seeds I've planted instead of leaving it to God to water their lives. But the fact that God has taught me my flaws was truly an eye opening experience for myself as well as for the people. I wanted to represent myself as God's child and their family/friend.

One thing I learned this past Sunday is that love is to be self-less. I want to be a woman of God that can give herself to his people 110%. I slowly found the comfort of talking with the sisters at the covenant house. It wasn't much of a difference anymore then just talking with my church sisters. I saw through the girl's problems and present issues and was able to see them as just as any other person of this world who wanted something more to life than just living it carelessly. I could see hope in them and I truly believe that in times of suffering and hardship is when we find God and develop the intimate relationship we always needed in our lives.

It's a constant battle living here in NYC, and I wanted to be there for the girls and to make sure to show them that I am no different than they are. No one is any better than anyone; cause without Jesus there's no other hope and nothing else to lean on for happiness and freedom.

It's going to be a challenge but I believe that this experience in serving in AHAV has truly opened the doors for me to take that big leap into something greater than what I'm doing in my life as of now. I know the changes in these sisters lives might not be gradual but all I need to remind myself and others is that God is in control and that he always as a purpose for everything and everyone.

With that said I would like to share something with you all (Passage taken from a friend of mine)…

A compelling and approriate passage from Oswald Chambers' Aug. 3 devotional from "My Utmost For His Highest" (link)

"We are not taken into a conscious agreement with God's purpose— we are taken into God's purpose with no awareness of it at all. We have no idea what God's goal may be; as we continue, His purpose becomes even more and more vague. God's aim appears to have missed the mark, because we are too nearsighted to see the target at which He is aiming. At the beginning of the Christian life, we have our own ideas as to what God's purpose is. We say, "God means for me to go over there," and, "God has called me to do this special work." We do what we think is right, and yet the compelling purpose of God remains upon us. The work we do is of no account when compared with the compelling purpose of God. It is simply the scaffolding surrounding His work and His plan. "He took the twelve aside . . ." ( Luke 18:31 ). God takes us aside all the time. We have not yet understood all there is to know of the compelling purpose of God."

Thanks to God I've continued to learn and seek to be more christ-like and humble/patient as he was.

- Sara

July 27th, 2008

2008-08-01T10:12:00.000-07:00

The whole Ahav experience has being really challenging, humbling for me, and also opened up my eyes to be more aware of my surroundings.

My primary role in Ahav this semester was mainly supervising arts and craft at the covenant house on 41st street, working with young women age range from 18~21. Most of these women have either ran away from home or got kicked out.

I struggle with reminding myself why I serve in Ahav because the nature of this ministry is very fluid, not very structured and at times almost unpredictable of people's reactions and behavior. God reminded me of Jesus' compassion when he served, and also reminded me that He never gave up on me. He reminded me of His love for me and His people.

As I get older and older, I realized it is a tougher to stay passionate for God's people and believe in God's transforming power according to the Bible. But through Ahav, I'm seeing how God is touching not only the hearts of these women that He loves, He is also breaking me to see how much I need Him, and realign my purpose to His purpose. It's all about Him.

Many of these women have shared with me about their past, and most of the time, I can't even relate to the things that they go through at such a young age. All I could do is to pray for them, talk to them, hopefully to develop more relationship through the short 1.5 hour we have every Sunday. I've learned not to focus my purpose of serving based on the fruit, but to remember that they are people that God loves, and it is a continuing life long process, for them, and for me as well.

I really believe that God can use anyone who is willing, and He has shown me what He can do through a small team of 12. Working through us, and also changing each one of our views.

Please pray for Ahav, for the people, and for God to be the center.

-Yvonne

July 20, 2008

2008-07-24T05:25:00.001-07:00

So every week, I've been going to either DeWitt Park or Open Door, the shelter on 41st Street to serve homeless (and non-homeless) people. This past week, I spent most of my time at the park chatting with Ronnie, a disenchanted war veteran who couldn't care less whether he lived or died. When I initially approached him offering a lunch bag, I was given the insulted response "I aint homeless". I remembered an incident a few weeks ago, which left me pretty shook, when a man with no legs cursed at me for a good 20 minutes when I offered him a sandwich. This time, however, I allowed the Spirit to move in me and I trusted that God would open Ronnie's heart. I told Ronnie that it didn't matter whether he was homeless or not, I just wanted to keep him company. Plus, a man's gotta eat.

After some awkward small talk, Ronnie and I started to talk about a lot of things that were on his mind. His issue with me handing out sandwiches was that he believed the people receiving the sandwiches didn't deserve them. Criminals, rapists and murderers, he called them. I countered that we're all sinners and all deserve punishment. He called himself Catholic and understood that Jesus took that punishment for us, but could not get his head around how a good God could let a child be molested and not stop it. To him, child molesters were the worst of all sinners and no legal punishment was harsh enough. He told me a gruesome story about how he and his friends took it upon themselves to inflict torture and ultimately capital punishment on a neighborhood child molester.

We continued our conversation as he recounted stories from war and prison. Somewhere along the line, Ronnie really started warming up to me and said things like "You're a good kid, I can see it in your eyes", "I love you people" (referring to Christians) and "I hope we don't have another war, but if we did, I would want you out there with me". Through my conversations with Ronnie and dozens of other people, I've begun to realize that everyone has needs and God can use us, if we are willing, to provide. I've seen how people respond to an act of service as small as a lunch bag or a short conversation and I want even more now for God to use us for his work, no matter what it is.

Each week so far has been a very different experience due the fact that we're dealing with people who may or may not be homeless, hungry, sober or even sane. Yet despite all the variables, there is one constant, and that's God. He has been amazingly faithful, always opening people's hearts, providing the right words for me to speak and covering my iniquities. And all He asks of us in return is for us is to love Him and love our neighbors as ourselves! (Matthew 22:39)

-Albert

July 13, 2008

2008-07-17T16:19:00.000-07:00

Going to the guy’s floor at the Covenant House has been a challenge every week so far this summer. Most of the challenge comes from the lack of interest or attention that we receive when we get there, and getting their attention is never really easy. This past week wasn’t going to be any easier since I was going there alone, but God has funny ways of making the best out of what I think are impossible situations.

Like usual, there were a few guys hanging out in the lounge watching the TV and others just walking back and forth between rooms. I told myself earlier that day that I wasn’t going to waste any time trying to gather people to do the activity that I had planned. I was just going to place myself in the lounge and start setting up, then, hopefully, things would just fall into place.

What I had planned was a rap contest. I would provide the beat from my iPod, and with notepads that I brought, the guys would write verses and compete when everyone was done. I took out my iPod and speakers, started playing the beat, and a few guys came over and just started freestyling. More and more guys were gathering in the lounge until there were about 20 guys crowded around the center of the room. A few guys were battled each other by trading verses back and forth, and they even convinced me to say a few lines (my career in rap never really looked promising).

I had really hoped that I would be able to talk to someone one on one before I left, but since there were so many people in the lounge, it seemed like that wasn’t going to happen. However, I did find a guy sitting off to the side by himself, he’d been writing the entire time. I was really glad that I got to talk to him because we shared a lot about our thoughts on Christianity and how he’s had a lot of doubts and second thoughts over the past few years. I know that this might have only been a special, rare occasion, but I did feel that God was beginning to open doors for us on this all guys floor at the Covenant House. I’m really looking forward to all that God has planned because we all have faith that He can move mightily!

--Eric

June 29, 2008

2008-07-02T16:50:00.000-07:00

This past Sunday, I went to Open Door with Albert. It was my first time doing street outreach, so I didn’t really know what to expect. On our way to Open Door, I asked Albert questions about the place since he had been there before. In my mind, I was trying to plan out how everything would work out and thought of things I would say.

When we got there, nothing really went according to how I imagined it and I didn’t have a chance to say the things I was preparing in my head. I didn’t know what Linda meant when she shared last week how it’s hard to decipher who’s actually homeless or not, but it was true. I couldn’t tell if the people standing outside of Open Door were homeless or just out socializing. Regardless, we asked people if they wanted a bagged lunch. Most of them quickly accepted. We tried to get to know them, but it was difficult to engage in a conversation.

Soon it started to rain and thunder, and because of the thunder, car alarms started going off. It was chaos. Most people were gone, and we stood around for a while. A man named Thomas asked for a sandwich for a lady inside. We had a chance to talk to him, and it turned out that he wasn’t homeless. He started the conversation by asking us, “Who are you going to vote for?” He was just willing to talk to us about anything, from jazz to the presidential candidates. After awhile, he went inside to give the lady her bagged lunch.

As we were standing outside, unsure what to do next, I was just thinking about all the people we had met. I couldn’t help but feel frustrated that we were only able to introduce ourselves and say where we were from. Most of the people seemed interested only in the sandwiches and juice boxes.

After meeting the rest of the team at Port Authority, we debriefed and had time to pray together. Later that day, I got reminded of a verse I had during the previous week:

If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have no love, I gain nothing. 1 Corinthians 13:3

Even though it’s frustrating at times, I was reminded that I just need to love these people, have patience, and leave the rest up to God. I really hope that God will continue to grow our hearts for the people we’ve met so far, and for those we will meet during the coming weeks.

--Jane

June 22, 2008

2008-06-26T07:11:00.000-07:00

This past Sunday, I went to Covenant House on 52^nd Street. The plan was that Julia and Jane would go over resumes and interviewing strategies, while I watched the children. When we arrived, we found out that the staff member Julia had spoken to forgot that we were coming that day. After a few minutes, the mothers started to drop off the kids with me. One mother strolled in with her 5 month old boy. Then another mother came in with a 10 month old. Then another with a 2 month old. I started to have a mini-mini panic attack in my head, "Please, please, please God, don't let me kill these babies."

The mother with the 2 month old child came down after 5 minutes saying that she was antsy leaving her baby behind. I don't blame her.

I took 10 month old Jonathon out of his stroller and played with him, while keeping an eye on the 5 month old, praying that he would continue sleeping for the next two hours. That didn't happen. Within 15 minutes, he woke up and started to scream bloody murder. I tried putting Jonathon down to pick up the 5 month old, but right when I set Jonathon down, Jonathon started to scream bloody murder. They were about to bust some veins. So I picked Jonathan back up, and immediately he stopped crying. I tried to remember what Julia had said before we set out, "watching the children is a form of ministry too. These kids need love.” So I said a quick prayer, asking that God will protect and guide His children. I also prayed that this 5 month old would stop crying.

The two mothers came down to get their children and mentioned to me that one of the women was having contractions. I went up to the 2^nd floor and saw a group of women fanning a very, very pregnant woman. It was pretty awesome to see all these women getting together and helping this lady out. As Julia said last week, at times it did seem as if the women at CH were “competing” with one another, so it was encouraging to see them work together.

As our team came back together to debrief and pray, I really felt convicted to remember to keep the AHAV ministry and the people in prayer throughout the week. It’s easy to get caught up with our own busy lives during the weekdays and treat our outreach as a “Sunday thing.” But our ministry is continuous, and God desires a faithful heart from His disciples. So let’s keep these people and our team in prayer throughout the week!

--Alison

Summer AHAV - June 15, 2008

2008-06-23T08:54:00.000-07:00

This past Sunday was the first day the summer AHAV team ventured out to Dewitt Park, Open Door, and the Covenant House. Our team of about 15 split up into our respectively assigned locations with most of us not knowing what to expect.

Eric and I set off to Dewitt Park armed with bagged lunches and a guitar. On the way there, Eric asked me how to begin talking with the homeless because I had done AHAV last summer. I told him to be casual and treat them like anyone else. (He ended up not having a problem talking speaking with them at all, even in Spanish!) When we got to the park we first approached two men, Lamar and his friend (can’t remember his name). They were sitting on benches with a cart filled with scrap metal. We gave each of them a bagged lunch and began making small talk, but Lamar seemed suspicious and immediately began to question where we were from and what our intentions were. He asked us how we were going to help him. He told us a bagged lunch meant nothing and what he really needed was housing. He expressed his frustrations regarding his situation on the streets, governmental policies, his feelings (of support) towards Obama, and the need for change in this country. I was honestly surprised by his blatant honesty and a little uncomfortable with his strong feelings. Still, as we continued to talk with Lamar, we found out that he was a believer of Christ and interested in going to church.

There were about 6-8 other homeless people in the park that day. I had some trouble figuring who to offer a bagged lunch and who not to, because I couldn’t always tell if the men and women we saw were homeless. I guess that just goes to show that the homeless are not a “type” of people. They’re really just like us, human beings. Regardless, I recognized Henry, George, and Tijuana from last summer. While it was nice to see familiar faces it was frustrating to know that people I’d met last summer were still in a similar, house-less condition a whole year later. They were all friendly and graciously accepted the bagged lunches but quickly excused themselves when I mentioned that we were having Bible study.

In the end the only people left in the park for Bible study were Lamar and a man we’d also met last summer who only spoke Spanish so we decided not to have Bible study.

Afterwards, the groups that had gone to the park and Open Door headed towards the Covenant House to meet the rest of the team. We were surprised to walk in on 4 young single mothers, their young children, and the team hand in hand, praying.

At the end of the day, we gathered at Port Authority to debrief, share our experiences, feelings, prayer requests, and frustrations. Even though it’s just the beginning of this Ahav summer ministry, I think this team has started to see some of the startling realities and difficult lifestyles of homeless men and women. I think we are just beginning to realize that God is the only one who is above everything, and the only tangible hope through it all.

--Linda

Soul Food!

2008-05-12T18:16:00.000-07:00

So this was our end-of-semester sha-bang aptly named “Soul Food”. With the help of a lot of great volunteers from Remnant we were able to host this event for the kids at Covenant House and what a blessing it was!

Going into the event I was uneasy of how the evening would go since we hadn’t had consistent attendance from Sunday to Sunday. I was also skeptical on how these kids would receive our presentations which consisted mostly of songs with a Christian theme. Would they be bored? Would they be moved? Would they be offended? But once again I was reminded of God’s faithfulness and my lack of faith.

Before the event started we seated everyone that came and began serving food. Food is an equalizer that can cross all cultural/racial barriers. You serve free food to someone and you just made yourself a new friend. It was loud, it was rowdy, and it was….interesting, haha. Some of the conversations going on were not the most edifying, but I’m not judging. It was a rough start into the evening because people were still being very loud, wrapped in their own conversations and oblivious to the person singing on the stage. There was even a table of guys, the too-cool-for-school crowd -- you know the type -- that got up and started to walk out. I was like “ooooh man, not good”. This is exactly what I was afraid would happen. But finally, things started settling down and Soul Food was on it’s way.

After the crowd mellowed down a bit, the words of the songs being sung started to take it’s toll on a few in the audience and you could see a few people teary eyed. But I don’t want to give the impression that it was one big sob fest, ‘cuz it wasn’t. In between each performance we took volunteers from the audience to participate in dares/games where they could win prizes. This really got their attention and suddenly everyone was interested, even the too cool crowd (which I guess stepped out for a smoke and came back?). Personally, it was hilarious seeing some of the tough guys battle it out in a hardcore game of chubby bunny. Or seeing some of the ladies strut their vocal skills as American Idols.

After the songs, fun, and games we capped the evening with a testimony. This really brought the event into full circle, expressing who Jesus is, why we need him, how much he loves us just as a father ought to love his son and our need for forgiveness. This message seemed to resonate with a lot of the kids. You could tell by the attentive silence and the occasional sniffle.

Soul food was both a lot of fun and a blessing. It was definitely a unique experience fellowshipping in this manner with kids from a broken background. It helps remove stereotypes and realize, all the more, the potential harvest out there. I mean, who knew silly retreat games like chubby bunny would appeal to gangster kids -- like, seriously. It’s exciting taking part in God’s kingdom work and being witness to seeds being planted into unsuspecting hearts.

--Moses--

Such a Wild Ride

2008-04-26T08:19:00.000-07:00

So this past Sunday there was no formal AHAV program/event and since we are nearing the end of the semester I will instead discuss my overall impressions and highlights of this semester. I believe without a doubt that God hand picked our group cause we seem to have such a weird but at the same time really effective and awesome dynamic in our group. I think/hope that every week we grew to know God more and to love each other more and more as brothers and sisters in Christ.

Every week at AHAV to me was such a wild ride because we didn't know what would happen that week; we didn't know who we would meet, how they would react to the message, and whether God would use us to make an impact in their lives. But every week God was faithful to our prayers and I believe that every week in AHAV was a fruitful mission in God's eyes.

My two personal highlights at AHAV were at Covenant House where we spent most of our outreach time. We met this guy S and he was a regular guy just trying to survive life. As we were talking and discussing the bible study it dawned on me (hopefully from Jesus) that he did not truly/fully understand the gospel. I think a lot of people hear the name Jesus but they do not truly understand what He did, why He did it and who He is. So when we explained it to him I saw this amazing joy in his face that showed me he truly now understood who Jesus is. He has such a seeking heart and all he needed/desired was a push in the right direction. Later on we had our own personal time to pray and as I heard S pray, I felt it was the most honest prayer I've ever heard in my life.

I think it was 2 weeks ago we had a discussion group at Covenant House and there was this girl name E who came to our group, but had the body language of "I dont wanna be here and I'm definitely not gonna share." She didn't really want to sit in our circle and she definitely didn't want to share or offer any insight to our discussions. I was thinking to myself "O God this is gonna be difficult." But praise God cause something happened and all of a sudden she started to open up so much. She asked us to pray for her dad who she has not seen in 2 years. She told me that she has a disability with her legs that prevents her from walking properly. The amazing thing was she was not really upset about it. She didn't blame God or anyone else but she believed that it happened for a reason. It was such an inspiration to learn that she wanted to work with disabled people because of what she has gone through. She thanked us, took a bible that we give out and went out to continue to seek God.

Personally I learned 3 things from God during this experience.1) God is so big and He is capable of anything so don't put limits on His power.2) Pray, pray, and pray cause it's God who does the work. It's not dependent on our abilities or what we can do.3) If I had such amazing outreach experiences with total strangers that I do not know and do not have a lot in common with, how much more should I be ministering to and loving my own friends and family who don't know Christ.

-- Richard

April 13

2008-04-18T21:16:00.000-07:00

Jon and Derrick joined us for Sunday Service. They have been coming to our church for a few weeks now and it was such a blessing to see once again how God has been continuously calling them into his arms. After the service, Jon, Derrick, and the AHAV team went upstairs for lunch that was provided for newcomers. Then as usual, we walked over to the Covenant House for worship and Bible study. A lot of people joined us for bible study including some new faces: Derrick, Melroy, Elizabeth, Chris, and Dennis. Since it was our last bible study of the semester, we spent bible study time sharing prayer requests, interacting with one another. And specifically, in our small group, we had Derrick and Dennis. Derrick's prayer requests were having the courage to deal with peer pressure, not being influenced by his friends just to feel included. And Dennis' prayer requests were getting the guidance he needs to sort through all of his family problems as well as personal problems and making sure everything runs smoothly until he heads off to North Carolina to train for the Marine Corps.

What Derrick said when we were sharing how God has been working in us throughout the course of AHAV touched me the most. He told us he strongly felt that God has been listening and solving his problems ever since he participated in AHAV. He has been looking for a job for a month so he can continue to stay in Covenant House. God responded to his prayer request by giving him two jobs. He will be working starting this week. Now, Derrick doesn't have to worry about moving out of Covenant House because he will be making enough money to pay for his housing. Amen. This is one of many ways in which God has been listening to our prayers and showing us his unconditional love that he has for each one of us. It was such a blessing to see how God is transforming the lives of our friends for the better. He continues to amaze us.
But I also realized that God has also been transforming our lives as well. Through these Bible studies, I felt that each AHAV member had built a stronger relationship with God. It was so good to see how people from Covenant House started to open up more week after week, enabling friendships to blossom. I thank God for making all of this happen.

In the end, when we were done with our small group Bible study, all of us gathered together and ended the day with a fun worship song that involved both singing and dancing. This moment when everyone was laughing and praising God through worship was so precious and touching. I felt so much love that we had for one another, but more importantly love we had for God. It was such a great way to end our last Bible study. I truly hope that the friendships we built over the last few months will continue to grow and each every one of us will continue to live our lives in God's love.

-- Jae

Last Sunday

2008-04-13T21:21:00.000-07:00

So I’m supposed to blog for last Sunday. We brought Alicia, Derrick, John, and Chris to church in the morning. Anna offered to buy Alicia breakfast from Dunkin’ Donuts, which created some very interesting consequences. When we arrived at P.S. 111 I was like, “Where’s Alicia?” When she caught up with us, she was holding like a sausage egg and cheese, two doughnuts, five munchkins, and a Dunkin’-ccino. Alicia sat behind Jose, who turned around and wondered if he could have some, but Alicia had eaten everything. We concluded that it was probably because she is pregnant that she could eat so much. In the middle of the service, Alicia put her unfinished drink on the floor, kicked it a few seconds later, and the contents spilled over several rows of chairs. Luckily, I, who have been cleaning coffee stains in the church for a while now, rushed to get a rag and a mop (yes, I actually know where they are), so the only casualty was this poor sister’s black purse, which was on the floor, blocking (and soaking in) the sugar-high liquid.

After the service, we went to McDonald’s. I happened to sit with Derrick, who shared about his Grandma. Apparently, both Derrick and Christopher were somewhat affected by Pastor Bruce’s message. Henceforth, Derrick was convicted to visit his Grandma, and Chris wanted to visit his family in New Jersey. When we were about to leave, I prayed for Derrick, his Grandma (who has Alzheimer’s disease), and his cousin who lives with his grandma (but does not take care of her).

I don’t know if I should write about our debrief meeting in the church office, since Moses said I don’t have to write about it. Actually, I think today’s Bible study was the most interesting experience. I wonder if anyone will write about it. I shall quote Richard-we had the “worst ice-breaker ever”, but it was very effective, and in a way, a ton of fun. I think I’ll let someone else write about it. If Yoojung was there, she’d say it was “such a blessing, such a blessing.”

-- Josh

God Is Enlarging Our Hearts

2008-04-01T21:58:00.000-07:00

Robert introduced himself with a firm handshake, but hesitant smile. He stayed the duration of worship, but left not long after the sermon began.

That smile. Never left his face. I'd heard that Chris had come the week before. This week he made sure he didn't miss the chance to come to service. His arms were lifted high in praise as we sang "You are the source of life." Indeed, Jesus, You are the source of life. Lunch together after church is really deepening our relationship with him and the others. Later, Bible Study at Covenant House. He said he felt all tingly inside and it was good.

I didn't think Derek, dressed in his shirt and tie, was engaging because he was looking down almost all of worship. But after service he said he didn't want to leave. He felt safe at Remnant. The music was good. The sermon was good. It really touched him when PB said that we are either working for the glory of our master or striving to be our own master. He's got a loving heart that wants an intimate relationship with God, but sometimes everything is just so hard and confusing.

Jon arrived in NYC two months ago. Things have gone downhill for him since a falling out in Michigan. He has a strong Catholic background and is not afraid to share what he knows about the Gospel. He likes to play guitar and composes his own pieces; he played two songs for us.

The fact that all three who stuck around for service and lunch came back to Bible Study a little later that afternoon says something about the love that God is pouring out on His people.

Jamali couldn't stay awake during Bible Study.

Francisco missed Bible Study but said he wanted to come to church the next week.

Tricia is in school studying to be an RN. She says that at first glance, people think she's mean, but she really isn't. She is moving to Florida soon to continue her schooling. She came to Bible Study just because she was curious and her other friends were coming too. She has no Christian background, but wants to know more about who Jesus is.

Mandy is expecting in October! She stopped by at Bible Study on her way out to satisfying her craving for cake, chocolate or strawberry. She was pregnant this past year as well, but had a miscarriage only four weeks into the pregnancy. She is so excited for her baby and just hopes that her baby will be healthy.

Shia feels like God is always near to her. She learned that Jesus is the one that bridges the gap between man and God.

Wilfredo came a bit too late.

Menana missed Bible Study but blessed us all with a song she wrote about God.

I believe that these are some of the ways that God is enlarging our hearts.

--Anna

Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death. For what the law was powerless to do in that it was weakened by the sinful nature, God did by sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful man to be a sin offering. And so he condemned sin in sinful man, in order that the righteous requirements of the law might be fully met in us, who do not live according to the sinful nature but according to the Spirit (Romans 8:1-4).

Easter Sunday

2008-03-24T22:49:00.000-07:00

Last Sunday, Easter Sunday, we gathered at Covenant House at 9:30am to invite people to our Easter service. Honestly, when I first heard the idea, I did not think much of it, though I did have the premonition that something important had not been mentioned. I was like, hmm whatever, everything will be fine if I just do as I’m told.

When I woke that Sunday and put on my dress shoes and shirt, I thought, hmm, since the majority of Remnant is going to look all sparkly today, what should we tell our guests? I remembered how it felt to be underdressed, but my morning grogginess took over and I shuffled my way toward church without another worry.

As I walked toward Covenant House to meet the others at 9:30am, I thought, eh, it’s too late to do anything about it. I’ll just assure our guests to feel comfortable when they need assuring. We waited inside Covenant House as Father Placid looked for people who would be interested. At 10am, four people showed up: three adults and a baby.

Though they seemed to have dressed casually, I had a feeling that they were in their Sunday’s best. As I commented to Christopher, one of our guests, on his seemingly brand-new shoes, he responded that he got the shoes the day only the day before. He was wearing his very best shoes.

Though we did our best to make our guests feel well-attended, one of our guests continued to feel out of place, and eventually left after service amidst the chaos of after-service. We felt terrible for not having done more for her, and felt that we could have done much more. The other guests seem to feel much at ease when we finally said our goodbyes and “see you next week”. I think we learned something important from all of this, though what could be done about what we learned, someone except me might know the answer.

-- Josh

Not Quite As Planned

2008-03-24T22:34:00.000-07:00

This week’s Covenant House visit was different… in a good way. Things didn’t quite go as planned. Most ministry days usually consist of a short time of breaking the ice, followed by a bit of small talk with the residents along with a time of worship, bible study and prayer. Normally, several people show up together on time, and we follow our outreach schedule, but it seemed as if God had different plans this time. During yesterday’s outreach, initially, there were three people, two of which had to leave almost immediately, leaving one brother named Pedro in our company.

When I saw his eyes, I got the sense that he was wearied from enduring some distressful circumstances.After a bit of small talk, we somehow stumbled upon praying for him. We asked what was going on and he said that his father had kicked him out of his house and that there was tension between them. Despite the fact that we didn’t really know everything that was going on, we lifted the situation up to God in prayer and blessed Pedro.

When Pedro left, another group of people came into the sanctuary. There was one girl in particular that caught our attention with all her questions about God. Karen was really curious about God and proposed many of frequently-asked-questions concerning religion. But one thing really stuck out about her. After prayer time, she shared that she dropped her head and began tearing when she saw everyone else praying and insisted that she never cried. That was really amazing to many of us!

I’m so thankful that it’s always about Him and how He desires to move. We hope that God continues to change hearts, even our own hearts, as we continue our outreach at Covenant House.

-- Daeho

No Place to Rest His Head

2008-03-18T09:54:00.000-07:00

Before we headed out for our mission for the afternoon, someone shared a Bible verse that seemed so fitting for our experience in meeting homeless people. "Jesus replied, "Foxes have holes and birds of the air have nests, but the Son of Man has no place to lay his head."" Matthew 8:20. Jesus had no place to rest His head during His time on earth, as He left His home and comfort for the sake of God's kingdom. Of all people, He would empathize with the homeless who have no permanent place here.

We stood at the street corner outside of Open Door Drop-In Center handing out sandwich bags. We talked with the people who stopped by for a free meal and decided to share a moment with us while they waited for the shelter doors to open.

The stories that were unveiled by each person who stuck around were amazing in their detail and honesty. She's engaged again because her husband passed away. He was in the marines since he was a teenager, survived three bullets and is battling cancer now. One guy sang a song about God's eye being over the sparrow because God is watching over him and is not done with him yet. The one who looked older than his real age didn't know his firstborn son's name because he was forced to leave his house and country when he didn't make enough money to support his family.

We left that spot realizing we are completely dependent on God to guide us and to work in their lives. Our questions and abilities to speak well won't bring us anywhere, but God is the one who will lead us. At that transitory place, where the residents want so much to leave and move ahead in life, we pray that our God who identifies with the poor, needy and homeless, would meet with them and show them their true home is found through Him.

For me, I'm learning that nothing I own is mine by right. Being one with a home and possessions is not my identity- these things could be taken away from me tomorrow. I'm not simply a "rich" person privileged to be able to help out the "poor" person. I could very well become like them. The only thing that is unfailing is God's love and Jesus' command to leave all things to follow Him. May I be able to abandon all things and say I that am rich, not because of any earthly possession but because I have Christ in my life.

-- Cheryl

The Second Visit

2008-03-12T18:22:00.000-07:00

So, this was our second expedition to Covenant House. This week’s attendance was similar to last week’s, except it was mostly new faces. In the beginning we usually lounge around and make small talk as we wait for more to come. Some of the kids seemed to know each other. Maybe a little too well? There was definitely flirting going on and a little, as Julia might put it, “Holler’ing”. Fortunately, (or unfortunately, depending on your viewpoint), two of the guys doing the flirting had to leave before we even began.

We began our session with introductions and then a short time of praise. It’s a little weird because these kids are obviously not accustomed to singing praise songs. So they go from being loud and talkative to totally silent while we are singing, except the random person who sings out of key and the wrong words on purpose. Much props to Anna for doing a great job at leading praise.

We are still undergoing changes and fine tuning our program. We are no longer doing activities because of logistical reasons and are now focusing solely on bible study. Sounds kinda boring, huh? (shame on you if you said ‘yes’!). Well, you’de be surprised. It’s interesting being a participant and watching what these kids have to say. They have such different backgrounds than typical Asian-Americans. These are kids who truly know what it means to have nothing, to face death and survive, to be hated by those that should love them, to have no visible hope to grasp onto. They NEED the Gospel!

Unlike last week, we split up into two smaller groups rather than having one large group discussion. We proceeded to discuss John 1: The Word Became Flesh. It was probably a little over their heads since they lack in basic reading skills (again, we are still treading the waters and fine tuning our program).

Overall, our second visit was a success. We made connections with these kids. Had a few laughs, listened to some of their pains, and even got to pray for some of them one-on-one. We hope to see more of the same faces next time.

-- Moses

Our First Week at the Covenant House Was…

2008-02-19T19:35:00.000-08:00

...rather interesting and what we think may be divine. Then again, I guess technically everything in our lives is divine, right? But you get what I’m saying.

So our plan going to the Covenant House (a residential substance abuse/mental illness program for 18-21 year olds) for the first time was to divide our team into two groups: a) one would hold a Bible study in the chapel and b) the other would hold an activity group in the gym (i.e. charades and basketball). Due to last minute miscommunication and such, the activity group thing didn’t happen and so all 9 of us team members partook in the Bible study. We first started out with 2 people strolling into the chapel and then another dude named Moses walking in and saying, “This is the church service, right?” And so we started with an icebreaker. The typical small group icebreaker, that is with everyone going introducing themselves and a superhero that they want to be. Everyone’s responses were a bit funny. As the icebreaker ended and the Bible study started rolling, more than a handful of folk had made their way in, sat down in our big circle, and introduced themselves (and their favorite superhero).

The Bible study was good. A bit rowdier and tangential than our typical small group at church, but good nevertheless. They asked a lot of random doctrinal questions like, “How do you know there’s only ONE God?”, “Why did God make us if we might go to hell?”, “The fruit that Eve ate was an apple, right?”, etc. Along with the doctrinal questions (that sometime got out of hand and off topic so they weren’t addressed at the moment) came moments of honest and vulnerable sharing. One dude shared about how his mother died of AIDS recently and how he had to go to get himself tested for it as well (came out negative) and how he has no family at all -- no parents, no guardians, no grandparents… he spoke though of a hope in God. And there was the other side. Another dude, who my heart particularly went out to, spoke in bitterness and anger towards this God who created people to see if they would pass this “test” called life and if they didn’t, he sent them to hell. He spoke of how God likes to strike down people when they make a mistake. I wondered what sort of a life he had that caused him to see God in this way. It hurt me to see this because the God that I’d come to known is opposite in nature than the God that the dude was talking about (though I personally know from past experience the kind of bitterness he may be coming from).

This is a really exciting time because they’re hungry for truth. At the same time, there’s much bitterness stemming from life experiences that are stored up in them. I realized yet again that it is only through the working of God in people’s hearts that can produce any change. As the team members debriefed, we realized many things. It’s going to be an interesting journey ahead of us. Please join us in prayer for the friends that we meet at the Covenant House. Thanks!

-- Julia

P.S. Check out “THE AHAV TEAM” on the sidebar for profiles of the new spring team members!

Getting Ready for the Semester

2008-02-14T23:22:00.000-08:00

I unzipped the front pocket of my backpack, searched for coins and bills, counted $2, rushed to the MTA booth to get a metro card, and right before pulling a Mission Impossible stunt to reach the ready-to-depart N/R train, the doors closed. And I witnessed how my Ahav "troops" and the other "commander-in-chief," being already inside the train to go to Church Office, were leaving without me. With a smirk on my face and as one accustomed to these situations, I knew it was going to be one of those interesting semesters that you just never forget.

Once we had the Ahav group together at Church Office, we started the Training Session. It was a wonderful sight to see that half of our members were brothers (the Lord certainly answered our prayers!). I glanced once more but this time at the whole group. Josh was back in action for the third consecutive time; James was transitioning from participating in our previous major events to committing for the whole semester; Anna, whom I gotten to know through Friday prayer meetings, was finally getting the chance to be part of this ministry. It was also a blessing to see my Disciplicons peeps, Richard and Cheryl, choosing to do something different in respect to their work and usual activities (Similarly with Jae, Moses and Esther). With my partner-in-Christ, Julia, sitting next to me, I began to quietly thanked God for everyone that was present in our meeting room.

This Sunday, we are going to go to Covenant House for the first time to do activities and Bible Studies with the homeless youth/ youth at-risk. I’m very excited about our initial interaction with the youth as well as for the subsequent weeks, desiring to see this ministry move where God leads. I know the journey will not be easy and pleasant at times, but like a portion of coal under great pressure, we become like diamonds through the good struggles and trials. I can’t wait to see how God is going to mold us and use us for His kingdom through Ahav. Please, pray for us.

By day the Lord went ahead of them in a pillar of cloud to guide them on their way and by night in a pillar of fire to give them light, so that they could travel by day or night. Neither the pillar of cloud by day and the pillar of fire by night left its place in front of the people.

Exodus 13:21-22

Guide our ways, oh Lord.

Never ahead of You.

-- Jose

Click. Click. Click.

2008-01-01T16:07:00.000-08:00

He turned around and tried again.

Click. Click. Click.

The bright orange glow that finally appeared at the end of the cigarette commanded silence. Three times before, he pulled from his dirty green jacket pocket half-used cigarettes picked up off of the ground, a common practice among the homeless who are desperate for something to indulge themselves in. Three times before, he lit cigarettes and took a single puff before the tiny flame burnt the leftover tobacco into ashes while dispassionately answering all of my shallow inquiries into his life.

This time, it seemed wrong to talk in the moment, to take away from what pleasure Don had left to hold onto in this world. Pleased with his victory against Mother Nature, he sucked in that potent smoke and breathed out noxious fumes that induced him to cough a smoker’s cough. Though I was concerned before, this time I felt right about asking him if he was ok. Then I told him that he should probably stop smoking. He agreed.

My time with Don was short. We didn’t talk too much. He confessed to me that he didn’t always have any words to say anyway. I didn’t either. Regardless, we spent about an hour together that day, exchanging what words we did find within ourselves in a weak attempt to establish friendship through such means. Nevertheless, I found two moments beyond words – in particular because of the very absence of my own words – that paint my memory of Don that day.

Between that third and fourth cigarette, we had made our way to the south-west corner of Clinton Dewitt Park. Pleasantly warmed by the descending sun, we found solace on the cold, bare cement with our backs up against the metal gate. We came this way to “fellowship”, as he called it, by talking, eating, and being together. Unraveling his blanket revealed a plastic Duane Reade bag containing a box of cookies, two small pies, and a plastic bottle of milk. Much like I offered him half my sandwich earlier, he offered me his cookies, though I felt too guilty taking any. Now I feel guilty about not taking any. It is a strange human emotion, that which finds more joy in sharing pleasures with another than to keep it for oneself. I wish I didn’t deny him that.

Our conversation about his hometown Dallas and his sister stopped quickly, especially since his cookie-crumb filled beard kept pointing away while his voice rambled on beneath the roaring of the cars in front of us. The sun set equally as fast, taking with it the comfort we had in its light. I started to think of what else I could do. As a result, we sat there in silence, watching cars pass by with a brilliant orange-yellow beginning to fill the western sky. After a few minutes, I stopped thinking of what to do and just sat next to him.

Don started to laugh. For the first time, I saw him smile. I asked him why he was laughing. He said, “Just because.”

After that, Don and I headed back into the park. To the naked eye, we looked very much the same as when we walked out – but to the eye that looks deeper past apparent looks, a pair of friends walked with cheerful hearts and a new bond that spoke of God’s incomparable and indescribable work within the human soul.

God did work that day.

Earlier when we first met, we talked sporadically about whatever question I could conjure up. The conversation never lasted too long because I couldn’t make out his mumbled response. After the first three or four times, I became a tad too embarrassed to keep asking him to repeat himself and nodded my head in feigned agreement instead. He eventually shared about his loneliness and how he felt that he didn’t belong to any group or community in the city. Before he was about to leave, I told him that he was always welcome in God’s family.

For the next ten minutes, Don spoke and I remained silent. He spoke of the gospel and of Jesus Christ and of the promises of God. Verses from the Bible that had been committed to memory earlier in his life accompanied his words. At first it seemed like he was talking to me but later I realized he was really talking to himself. Perhaps he had forgotten the uncompromising and unwavering love of Christ. As Don remembered, tears started to well up in his eyes. He spoke with confidence that God does not fail, even amidst his sorry state of homelessness and loneliness.

I sat there, stunned by Don’s words. I complain about not having a comfortable chair at work or only having to choose from fried chicken, pizza, and Mexican food for dinner. My struggles are far less than what Don experiences every day, yet his hope remained strong.

About a year ago, I came across a quote by Francis Schaeffer. He said, “Man is magnificent, even in ruin.” I’ve spent about a year trying to experience this idea and I’m just starting to see its truth. Being with Don didn’t give me any startling revelations. It just helped me to see a little bit better what Schaeffer was talking about – the beauty of humanity, the wide expanse of emotions of the soul, and the invisible touch of God that creates hope in even the most hopeless of people.

“There are no ordinary people. You have never talked to a mere mortal. Nations, cultures, arts, civilizations--these are mortal, and their life is to ours as the life of a gnat. But it is immortals whom we joke with, work with, marry, snub, and exploit--immortal horrors or everlasting splendors. This does not mean that we are to be perpetually solemn. We must play. But our merriment must be of the kind (and it is, in fact, the merriest kind) which exists between people who have, from the outset, taken each other seriously--no flippancy, no superiority, no presumption. And our charity must be real and costly love, with deep feeling for the sins in spite of which we love the sinners--no mere tolerance, or indulgence which parodies love as flippancy parodies merriment. Next to the Blessed Sacrament itself, your neighbor is the holiest object presented to your senses. If he is your Christian neighbor, he is holy in almost the same way, for in him also Christ vere latitat, the glorifier and the glorified, Glory Himself, is truly hidden.”

C.S. Lewis, The Weight of Glory

~Irwin Kim

Jesus' little elves

2007-12-23T22:05:00.000-08:00

So, although our last semester outreach was last Sunday, we had half of the presents, graciously created by the small groups for Operation Christmas Ahav, to hand out. So we had another day of outreach today after service. Fun times! We had 4 or 5ish garbage bags full of beautifully wrapped shoeboxes. I felt like we (Sherry, Gigi, Josh, Jose) were Santa's (well, more like Jesus') little elves walking down the block. It felt good to be bearers of good things.

Anyways, so we arrived at the Open Door shelter (though before we went there, Jose and Sherry went to the park to hand out the shoebox gifts there, as well). There were a lot of people there and we all know from previous experience the feeling of having a bunch of people rush at us to grab whatever goods that we have (a bit scary; just a lil)… so we devised a plan to have the people line up in order to receive a gift. At one point when we were getting ready to leave, having handed out all the gifts, I saw a woman open up her shoebox with another man (her husband?) and they together intently read the card that a small group member made. I pray that they only see the heart of Christ behind all of this.

But I'm going to be honest. At one point when we were leaving, I thought to myself, "Well, there are those few that seem to really appreciate the gifts. But the rest of 'em don't really seem to appreciate what we gave" as there were no shouts of "Thank you for the gifts!" as we visibly departed. But as I'm writing this entry now, I'm reminded of the ten lepers that Jesus healed and how only one returned back to thank Him. I too am just like them; I've received so much from the Lord but how many times do I go back and thank Him for the love that He's sacrificially demonstrated towards me and continues to demonstrate to me? Ouch, what a humble reminder.

The semester is over and looking back, I think it was challenging for all of us in many ways. The ugliness of our hearts, our lack of love was exposed like a mirror as we attempted to "minister" to those without homes… two friendship dinners, clothing handouts, weekly outreaches, and an Operation Christmas Ahav later, I'm not sure how much of an "impact" we've made. But our eyes have been further opened to reality, as ugly as it may seem. I hope that the reality of the beauty of Christ that transforms ashes to beauty will be made further evident next semester. To be continued (next year/semester)…

-- Julia

Operation Christmas Ahav

2007-12-19T20:03:00.000-08:00

This past Sunday the Ahav team went to Open Door to hand out some of the boxes that smallgroups helped pack for Operation Christmas Ahav. Before heading to Open Door, we discussed how we should hand out the boxes. In prior weeks when we passed out clothing, we formed a cluster in front of Open Door and people formed a line in front of us. It was hectic and we didn't get a chance to talk to many people. Jose suggested that this time we should approach people waiting in line for food at Open Door so that we could hand out the boxes in an organized fashion and hopefully be able to facilitate some more conversations.

When we arrived at Open Door, there was nobody there! It was too early in the day for people to form a dinner line outside. A few men saw us standing around and said that everyone was waiting inside because it was too cold outside. They went inside and told people to come out. A surge of people came outside and we handed out the care packages. Again, we weren't able to have many conversations with people since everything happened so quickly. At most, I was able to briefly mention that the care packages were put together by people from our church.

When we finished handing out the boxes, a few men lingered and said thank you. One was so joyful that he sang us old blues songs and danced around. Another man passed by and showed us that he was wearing the new gloves that had been in his care package. He said that they were just what he needed. As we left Open Door a few more men approached us on the street and asked if we had any more boxes. We apologized and told them that we had run out of boxes and that we would be back next Sunday with more boxes. As I looked at one of the men's cold, bare hands I wished that I had another pair of gloves to give him.

The team walked a couple blocks to Dunkin Donuts to wait with Yvonne as she waited for someone. Right after we stepped into the store, a homeless man approached us and asked us for change. We said that we couldn't give him money but asked him if we could buy him some food instead. He agreed and began sharing the story of how he ended up on the streets. At the end of the conversation we prayed with him and said goodbye. As I left Dunkin Donuts I thought of how faithful God is. We had tried on our own to come up with a strategy on how to approach people at Open Door. Obviously our strategy didn't really work out. However, we met the man at Dunkin Donuts through God's impeccable timing (and no planning of our own).

-- Sherry

An Angel: The Perfect Stranger….

2007-12-11T21:59:00.001-08:00

"Do you guys have any t-shirts?" We looked into our pile of donated clothes for the clothing drive and mustered up a sweatshirt and a few collared shirts and offered it to Ray.

He looked at them, and asked again, "Do you have t-shirts?" We dug around some more and found a size medium, something that'd look really tight on him and might not even fit him. But he said "No it's perfect, I'll take it."

"Do you want this sweatshirt? It's bigger and would probably fit you better. Or we have these collared shirts too."

He smiles, "I only wear t-shirts. Thank you."

Humble but determined, that was the Ray we first met. We soon found out that he's been homeless for the past year and five months, and he's been preaching here ever since then. He began to share his testimony as I gazed on with curiosity, but more over, with skepticism. But the minute he started quoting scriptures and showing us his Bible with numerous highlighted scriptures and notes, I realized how wrong I was and how sinful I was to even dare to judge him by his clothes and appearance. For all I know, in the 10 to 15 minutes that he was sharing, if I hadn't met him here in this context, but rather in a church setting, I would've thought he was a pastor. He spoke with the same fire and zeal and joy as any other pastor.

He had been addicted to drug, alcohol, fornication, and sex and violence on TV. Basically according to him, you name it, he did it; for the past 18 years. Despite all this, God found him and saved him. He woke up to the sound of a sermon on TV one morning still intoxicated from the night before. But suddenly felt a surge of warmth and the urge to cry. Not wanting his son to see him, he hid away in the restroom and cried and repented for a good 6 -7 minutes. He came back from the bathroom a bit dazed, and felt the devil tempting him with the physical need to go and pick up the beer can on the table. He reached for the can, but suddenly felt the tingling and urge to cry again. He went away and repented in the bathroom once more and when he finally emerged, he was sober and cleansed. He no longer had the urge to drink. He's even been drug free and celibate on the street for the past 13 months. Praise be to God.

Because he's felt God's love upon him and had experienced such a powerful salvation from the Lord, he decided to live daily preaching His word.

Ray's testimony was so humbling and encouraging. Here we are worrying about the latest fashion, the most popular restaurants, and worrying about not having enough time to have work-life balance when all that he cares about is that he has just enough layers to keep him warm, enough to not starve, and spends the rest of his time spreading the glory of God. Towards the end, he shared with us Hebrews 13:2 "Do not forget to entertain strangers, for by so doing some people have entertained angels without knowing it."

That verse totally convicted me and was a case in point of my humbling encounter with Ray. He was an Angel - the perfect stranger that God had sent to me on that cold Sunday afternoon. In His timing, He will reveal Himself to you and cleanse you of all your sin and impurities.

-- Gigi

2007-12-05T18:20:00.000-08:00

AHAV gathered all the clothes together for the clothing drive after church on Sunday. Then we took them to Open Door and started handing them out. It was definitely hectic, but nonetheless worth it. This time, it felt different. Something felt more difficult, because everyone was hovering over the clothes and we constantly had to make sure that nothing was just being grabbed. I know that in the end, its all for the good and it's nice to know that they may be just a little bit warmer in this cold weather. But i realized how selfish i was being by thinking about how freezing it is for me, and how hectic and how unorganized everything was. Afterwards, we went to the subway terminal area and had debriefing. It kind of drew me back and i took a good look at where my heart was really at. I didn't realize it until i really stopped, paused, and thought about it. I learned two valuable lessons that sunday. One, Organize ahead of time. Two, Be selfless, love strangers.

-- Nicole

2007-11-28T22:13:00.000-08:00

My Ahav experience this week was really refreshing in different ways. Instead of going out for the outreach, Julia and Jose decided that we should stay in and just refocus ourselves to God. They wanted to make sure that we don't loose sight of why we're doing and planning all these friendship dinners and getting things done.

We had a good time of worship, prayer for the ministry, and ended by praying for one another. I was really refreshed and thankful that the leaders of this ministry knows the importance of drawing to God personally before serving others, and seeking God's heart is more important than having things we planned go the way we want to.

I'm looking forward to this week's outreach, where we'll be handing out clothing for the winter. It's always great to be warm in the cold!!! :)

Psalm 127:1

"Unless the LORD builds the house,
its builders labor in vain.
Unless the LORD watches over the city,
the watchmen stand guard in vain

-- Yvonne

2007-11-22T10:36:00.000-08:00

Last year, my junior year as an undergrad, was the year of Me. I selfishly spent all my time and energy trying to build myself up. At the end of the year I realized how foolish I had been and how I had caused my own heart to become tattered. The realization that Ecclesiastes is correct in describing everything as "meaningless" was almost too much for me to bear. Really, how important was that internship? That new article of clothing? That [insert a number of other idols]? Ultimately none of them gave me hope or life.

God opened my eyes to see that He is the only life giver and thus He is the only one worth worshiping. As He pieced my heart back together and covered my brokenness with his love, He also showed me more of what is on His heart. I am to love God and to love all that He loves. It was at this time that I felt a conviction to join Ahav again.

Early this semester, my small group studied Matthew 14:13-21. I always thought that the passage showed that God can do miracles and that we cannot put Him in a box. While this is true, my small group leader brought up another point that stunned me. Matthew 14:1-12 is about how John the Baptist, Jesus's homeboy, was beheaded. Verse 13 and 14 say, "When Jesus heard what had happened, he withdrew by boat privately to a solitary place. Hearing of this, the crowds followed him on foot from the towns. When Jesus landed and saw a large crowd, he had compassion on them and healed their sick." Jesus was so selfless. He was so filled with love that instead of focusing on himself and the sad things going on in his personal life, he chose to be with the large crowd of people and to heal their sick. Through this God showed me even more of His heart.

This is a great reminder for me as I serve in Ahav. Sometimes it is a challenge to stay focused because thoughts of schoolwork and the cold weather linger in my mind. And sometimes it can be disheartening when things don't go as I had hoped. However, all the more, Jesus's example challenges and encourages me to serve wholeheartedly in Ahav. To not focus on myself but on God and on the people He loves.

Turn your eyes upon Jesus
look full in His wonderful face
and the things of earth will grown strangely dim
in the light of his mercy and grace.

-- Sherry

2007-11-14T16:05:00.001-08:00

When Yoojung, Mark and I went to open doors to pass out the flyers right before the friendship dinner. Then two men came with us back to the DeWitt Park. One of them was Hassein and the other was Joseph. I got to know Hassein better, and he said something that really struck me. Half way through our walk to the park, he said he forgot his bag with his stuff in it. So I offered to go back to open doors and he replied, "No, it's okay. If it isn't there when I come back, then that means someone who needs it more than I do took it." I realized, wow. If I was him, I would be running back, so worried. But his responose was so unselfish, so understanding. It just amazed me.

-- Nicole

A glimpse of heaven….

2007-11-09T05:20:00.000-08:00

After 4 weeks at AHAV, I realized just how hard my heart has become since moving to NYC. It’s been a year and even though my life took on a 180 degree change to the positive, my heart remained in the gutter. It’s almost as if I closed off my heart to everyone around me because I’ve been so hurt. But after serving in AHAV, I realized, my “so-called” burdens seemed so trivial compared to the trials that the homeless faced on a daily basis. How can I be so selfish when I am so blessed?

One thing that strikes me the most was their optimism. They may not have food and shelter for the night, and probably won’t for the day after and the day after that. But they don’t seem fazed by it at all. Whenever we ask them how they’re doing, their response would always be something along the lines of “I’m good, just getting by” along with a few lines of gratitude for the food that we give them. They don’t look down upon themselves for being homeless and as long as we talk to them with respect and no belittlement, they are all quite open about their past and experiences. If anything, they’re even more open and much stronger than you and I. Things as simple as enjoying a cup of coffee given by a stranger can make them happy. And their world is seems so simple and black and white. In terms of living, we’d worry about the location, the rent, and furnishings. If we had a pet, we would worry about what type of pet, should we have a dog walker, what type of food and etc. But to them, they would rather live on the streets just so that they can keep the stray dog with them (shelters don’t accept dogs). Things really seem that simple and black and white.

That attitude helped to explain some of their carefree-ness at this past Sunday’s Friendship Dinner. Despite minor discomforts at the beginning, I was really impressed by their willingness to just go and have fun at the end. A lot of them ended up getting up and dancing to the music. They could have left after getting the free food, but they stuck around because it seemed as if they really wanted to be there…to hang out. At the end, what really blessed me the most was that some of the volunteers who hadn’t plan on coming out for the next two friendship dinners actually changed their minds and decided to come out! (God is just so good!) Some of them even commented, “So this is what heaven will be like”. It really shocked me, because yes, that is exactly what heaven will be like: Perfect strangers with absolutely different backgrounds altogether enjoying each other’s company and dancing to praise music. This is His kingdom.

Kingdom Dreamer…

I’m a kingdom dreamer,

I long to see the day when every tongue will say

That Jesus Christ, Jesus Christ is Lord.

I’m a kingdom dreamer,

Of broken hearts made whole and surrendered souls

To Jesus Christ, Jesus Christ the Lord.

I long to see the day,

When history will be made

Soften hearts will turn in reverence to the king.

That will be the day

Your glory on display

We’ll see captives dancing

On their broken chains.

-- Gigi

2007-10-30T21:26:00.001-07:00

Micah 6:8

"He has showed you, O man, what is good.
And what does the LORD require of you?
To act justly and to love mercy
and to walk humbly with your God."

Joining Ahav is probably one of those things you didn't really wanted to do, but you joined because you can't stand that tugging in your heart and the conviction you feel when you read about God's justice. But somewhere along the line, you realized how much you've being blessed by obeying. At lease, for me, it was.

After graduation I went through a period of time where I was really confused about why did I serve, how did I serve, and who am I really serving. I questioned why do people get together in church and study the bible and how am I really living out this life that's suppose to glorify God.

This past summer, was probably the peak of my doubts but was when I finally humbled myself and let God be God. I realized the reason why I was so unsatisfied with everything was because I put my hope in everything else but God: work, relationship, ministry, friends. Not these things in itself is bad, but I've put my hope in these things and they became my idol.

God showed me that to glorify Him is to really fully live in joy despite of situations because God is in control. He wanted me to continue to seek Him, to know who He is. Very simple but I tend to forget really easily.

God brought me back to focus my eyes unto Him, and to see how beautiful He is, and the hope that He has given me. He showed me how merciful and how constant His love for me is, even though I've walked away from time to time.

There was only one thing that God responded when I asked Him, how then, should I please you, other than really being satisfied and content with my situations knowing He is the only provider, the only hope.. but the ultimate provider, and the ultimate hope.

God then reminded me of Micah 6:8, and He reminded me of Ahav, and the secret convictions that I've felt before.

God reminded me of how constant His love for me was even though I walk away, and how constant His love also was to those who are homeless. I struggled with really "loving" the homeless, but God told me I can start with learning how to "serve" them first, and He will give me the love and the compassion that I need to serve them.

After I joined Ahav, although it has being brief so far... I'm already really humbled and realizing how much I am blessed to be able to serve these people and be served by them through some of their openness to share with me.

Joining Ahav answered lots of doubts and questions I've had before. More than that, it's opened my eyes to see outside of my own comfort zone, the ways I was taught to serve God. I felt overwhelmed with thankfulness at times when I look at the people because I saw how Jesus saw me when I was lost. Jesus reminded me of His ministry.

I'm still learning and constantly asking God to teach me how to be creative in serving these people, not just physically but spiritually. I'm also learning to be patient in many ways as I serve these brothers and sisters. There are times my selfishness gets the best of me, but thankfully God understands and is continually changing me.

Focusing on my own growth isn't the reason why I joined Ahav, but somehow, I'm so blessed and I can't deny how privileged I am to be able to join Ahav.

Romans 11:33-36

33 Oh, the depth of the riches of the wisdom and knowledge of God!
How unsearchable his judgments, and his paths beyond tracing out!

34 "Who has known the mind of the Lord? Or who has been his counselor?"

35 "Who has ever given to God, that God should repay him?"

36 For from him and through him and to him are all things. To him be the glory forever! Amen.

Isaiah 61:1-3

1 The Spirit of the Sovereign LORD is on me, because the LORD has anointed me to preach good news to the poor. He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners,

2 to proclaim the year of the LORD's favor and the day of vengeance of our God, to comfort all who mourn,

3 and provide for those who grieve in Zion— to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the LORD for the display of his splendor.

-- Yvonne

2007-10-25T16:00:00.001-07:00

After this semester started, my life became heavy-laden with junior level mathematics. I was tired and frustrated, but there was one thing that I knew I had to do, and one place that I had to be. It does not matter how badly I am doing, it does not matter if I am not ready--I must join Ahav.

Ahav is the only place where I have no place to hide. It is the only place where I feel truly uncomfortable. That has been the way it is ever since I joined during the summer. Everything about Ahav makes me stand on my toes, makes my senses tingle with nervousness, and my heart break. Everything in Ahav is a struggle, every laughter a grace of God, every story an eye-opener, and every prayer an act of humility.

In Ahav, I know I am forced to open my eyes. I am forced to stand and not hide. I am forced to face my fears, short comings, and flaws. In Ahav, I am forced to grow.

If I were not in Ahav, I would not have seen the invisible people. If I were not in Ahav, I would feel no guilt in passing by a beggar, a homeless woman. If I were not in Ahav, I would not have taken notice the poster on the telephone booth that says "Don't almost give. Give." I would not have said to myself bitterly: Oh God, next time I meet that homeless person, let me have the courage to stop in my tracks, ditch my brothers and sisters, and talk to that perfect stranger.

The Voice of Truth --Casting Crowns

Oh,what I would do
To have the kind of faith it takes
To climb out of this boat I'm in
Onto the crashing waves
To step out of my comfort zone
Into the realm of the unknown
Where Jesus is,
And he's holding out his hand

--Josh

2007-10-18T05:19:00.000-07:00

God gave me an opportunity to be in New York through design internship and opened doors for me to serve in inner city missions through Ahav. I came out of this summer with an experience that blew away the greatest expectations that I could have held. I remember that I was convicted to serve in the inner city after going on missions to Guatemala. That trip was an experience in which I could have only seen and learned what I did by actually being in those poverty-stricken areas, but I was sure of my new desire to understand what God was doing in places that were closer to home. It became apparent that there was much brokenness and need in many parts of the U.S.

Through preparing for Ahav, I’m glad that we talked a lot about our main goals: 1) to bring the gospel of hope and love to our local community (Isaiah 61) and 2) to follow Christ’s command by sharing the good news to the poor and the brokenhearted, while providing comfort and physical assistance (Luke 4:18-19).

I learned many important lessons from Ahav, but one has left the deepest imprint on my heart. Above knowing God’s heart for people or, in this case, His heart for the underprivileged and poor, God desires for us to have His very heart for people. I saw that having His heart means making it a part of our lives so that… His Word will jump out of the pages and come alive.

When I think back on my wavering decision to even go to NY, I have to thank God continually because I wouldn’t have been changed by something so important to Him, I wouldn’t have been able to gain the laughter, friendships, and bonds that were created during Ahav outreach, and I wouldn’t have found Remnant Westside church, a way that I can stay connected with the inner city. I hope that my eyes will be opened more and more to how God is working in inner city ministry.

I also hope that as the Ahav team, we will be able to make both of our goals become real. I know that God’s heart for social injustice has become very real to us and I hope that, as a team, we can now implement the things we’ve learned so that, as a congregation, we can serve Jesus together by loving people and serving our community in eye-opening and transforming ways.

I pray for revival to breakout in NYC… revival among my brothers and sisters. Please keep us in your prayers!

Kutless - All Who Are Thirsty

All who are thirsty

All who are weak

Come to the fountain

Dip your heart in the stream of life

Let the pain and the sorrow

Be washed away

In the waves of his mercy

As deep cries out to deep we sing
--Yoojung

"I found something here today" (testimony from the Friendship Dinner)

2007-09-25T20:50:00.001-07:00

"Can I get you anything else?", I asked. She looked at her plate and said "Mmmm, maybe some more chicken?". She prefered chicken over beef. "Oh, and can you also make another plate for me? There's an old man in my building and I want to bring him some food". Her name was Edna and lived a few blocks away from the park. There were bags under her eyes. Later I learned that she had recently lost her son to AIDS. Her eyes watered as she shared about the son she terribly missed. For a moment, I felt she had invited me into her world and shared with me what was really going on. Even though it has been a month since the dinner, I can still feel the pain that resounded through her words as she choked back the tears. I wondered what kind of mother she must've been. Would she have saved a plate of food for her son if he were alive?

It was a small sanctuary in that park as people were shared a meal together and as live worship music played in the background. Before she left to go back to her building, she expressed how the heaviness and sadness she felt all week was dissolved. She asked me where we met for church and expressed her desire to come. Her closing comments impacted me the most: "I found something here today...I really did". There was a lightness in her countenance as she said goodbye and I could tell she left with something more than just free food.

"...Better is one day in your courts than thousands elsewhere"

You are the God of the broken
The Friend of the weak
You wash the feet of the weary and
Embrace the ones in need...

Christine Chang

Summer Pictures!

2007-09-10T11:19:00.000-07:00

Here are pictures from the summer. Can't believe summer is finished with already! We're getting ready for the fall semester... we're excited for what the Lord will do!

Friendship Dinner pictures:

men praying together at the friendship dinner

the team!!! (post-friendship dinner)

yoojung and donald c.

ministry/prayer-time at the friendship dinner

the couple that liz wrote about in a previous entry

----

Weekly Outreach pictures:

we are pretending to pray. haha, j/k..

our weekly post-sandwich-making/lunch-eating/discussing/praying time in the hallway near the boys' bathroom

we love her

at open door, a shelter/soup kitchen... one of the places that we go to weekly.

haha classic linda-pose

team picture before heading off to outreach (this particular week we were going out to have a "clothing drive" to give out donated clothing to people at open door)

My Self-Evaluation

2007-08-24T08:44:00.000-07:00

I could talk about the nitty-gritty of what transpired during our last outreach. I could describe how we all had a pleasant time at the park. I could narrate the conversation I had with Roger and his Mongolian friend Majig who happened to be wearing a Stony Brook T-shirt. I could write all about how Julia touched a homeless man’s eye-juice, how Yao’s Asics shoes were attracting the homeless, and how this random loser who was hitting on my sister, but I am not going to do that. This is a mini-testimony of mine. It is important to me and it marks the most dramatic change I had during this summer.

Being in Ahav has not been easy. Most of the time during our meetings and outreaches, I felt like I did not fit in. I felt a lack of confidence and a lack of faith. Being one of the youngest members and also one of the only two guys of the team, I tried very hard to get rid of the awkwardness I felt. I tried my best to do my job: I read Ahav books one after another and set up the sandwich tables, I tried to stick to the team until the bitter (and joyful) end, I tried to be there during the good times and bad times, and I tried to act tougher, more mature, and more involved.

I was forced to miss one outreach. During that weekend, I faced the horrible realization that my efforts to fit in were done in vain; the process of the realization was so unbearable that I will not mention it here. If I happened to let the story slip, all the color on your face will be drained away in an instant, you will be sick in the stomach, and your eyes will turn into the shape of -_-.

I realized that I have been pretending to be mature before my elder brother and sisters in Christ. I realized that I have not been treating my older teammates with the respect they deserve. I realized that I have been proud instead of being humble with a heart to learn. I have placed my physical body in the right place but failed to place my heart in the right place.

Last outreach was last Sunday. I played my part as usual: I brought the fruits and brown paper bags for the goodie bags for the homeless, I set up the sandwich tables (after I wiped them), and I get to the spot on time and ready to roll. It was different though; not because we all brought a friend along, not because there were more guys than usual, but because I gave up my pride and lowered my eyes and felt… alright.

Josh

2007-08-18T19:00:00.000-07:00

This past Sunday, I think we were all beginning to realize that this summer is quickly coming to an end. We debriefed about the Friendship Dinner, and we were all in agreement that the event was a huge success. It went better than any of us had imagined it might, and we all recounted how God had worked so amazingly that Sunday. The weather was perfect, and despite some last minute changes, set up with smoothly. Many people from the community came out to the event, most of whom were people from the park, Port Authority, and Open Door (a shelter near PA). They seemed to really enjoy the evening, and it was so encouraging to hear them share publicly about how God was faithful in their lives, and how their spirits were lifted as we served and spent time with them. We were also so encouraged by the hearts of the volunteers, who were all so willing to serve and love our friends, the homeless. Even people who hadn’t ever talked to a homeless person before were reaching out with such genuine love. It was amazing to experience and witness God’s love in the park that afternoon, as we came together so publicly as brothers and sisters. As Julia said, we had brought “church” to the park that afternoon – with worship, fellowship, prayer, and love.

After some time of debriefing, eating, and praying, Jose, Julia, Linda, and I headed over to our usual spot in the park. I spent some time talking to Henry there. We’ve gotten to know each other a bit throughout the summer, as he’s one of our “usuals” at the park. He’s usually pretty cordial and willing to talk, but he rarely shared his personal beliefs or feelings. The week before, he had been at the Friendship Dinner, but he had stayed on his usual bench the entire time, a bit removed from the activities. As I approached him this past Sunday, he was even warmer than usual. As we chatted, he told me how he had been so blessed the previous week during the Dinner, and how everything had been so beautiful. He told me how he could see God in us, and he even said he loved us. I don’t cry often at all, but I was having a hard time holding back tears as Henry shared about how blessed he had been, not just by the Dinner but by our weekly conversations. I was so encouraged, and am still amazed at how God has used us this summer. By his power and his love in us, we’ve been able to build trust and friendship with people who we (or I at least), would formerly have shunned and ignored.

We have only 1 Sunday left of outreach for the summer, and it saddens me that it’s coming to an end. I know in the Fall, my time will be limited as I continue school and serve in small group ministry, but I hope and pray that even though I won’t be able to go out with Ahav every Sunday, that the homeless will still be near to my heart. That I won’t forget the things I’ve experienced, and the lessons I’ve learned through these people whom God loves so much.

Nanette

Some pictures from the Friendship Dinner:

Friendship Dinner - Volunteer Testimony

2007-08-18T18:25:00.000-07:00

Upon hearing about the AHAV Friendship Dinner, I knew I wanted to be involved somehow and help out. I love people and I feel it is so necessary for us to be Christ to all those around us—so this opportunity to serve our brothers and sisters was completely appealing. After attending the planning meeting a week before the dinner, I was so ready for August 5^th to come.
All week I prayed about the event and was really excited, but knew that no matter what plans and expectations we all had, ultimately God would move how He pleased. And He sure moved in incredibly beautiful ways. As we were setting up and doing the prayer walk before the dinner happened, I could sense excitement in each of us, as well as a bit of anxiety—or perhaps that feeling was just in me. Soon enough, people started to come and sit down and we prepared for the night to begin.

Conversations and laughter filled the air as worship music could be heard in the background. Everyone seemed to be having a great time and as the time for sharing approached, God was surely moving. Some felt comfortable enough to share what good things God has done in their lives: up at the mic, with confidence, brothers and sisters alike spoke about God's goodness and mighty work. The wonder of the night continued as we served our brothers and sisters, not only with food, but with love and kindness, and genuine care.

The time for prayer, arguably my favorite time, came and again we invited anyone to come up and share a prayer request with us so we could intercede for them. One couple, Louana and Calvin Klein (no relation), came up and we prayed for them. God really broke my heart with every word they shared and as we interceded for them and lifted up their prayer requests, I was moved to tears. Needless to say, once the evening had ended and conversations and laughter continued, I went to Louana and CK and spoke with them. Twenty minutes and some teardrops later, I felt God saying "They need the Word. They are hungry for it." I walked over to my journal and picked up my Bible. I went back to Louana and CK and with my hand outstretched I gave it to them. We spoke more about God and His amazing work and I shared some of my favorite verses, telling them that it did not matter where they started, but whenever they felt they needed something, they could always turn to the little brown leather book between their hands. All the answers they would ever need could be found in there.

We spoke a bit more about God's Word and then Louana and CK both told me, "Today is different." They did not usually go to Open Door (where they had received the invite to our dinner). As we continued talking and praising God, I assured them that there were no coincidences that they were in the park that night and that we prayers for them were lifted up. Louana then confessed that she thought she would receive a brown book at the dinner. I had my Bible with me at the beginning of the night as I welcomed everyone there she told me that she had seen it and just felt like she might leave with one. I learned this once we had spoken about some particularly great verses.

As Louana and CK left the park soon followed by the others who came Sunday night, I could only praise God as I was in awe of all that He had done. I walked to the edge of the park with tears in my eyes as I prayed for the words we had heard and the prayers we had said. God is so good and there was not a moment during the evening when this was not evident. Amen.

Liz

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I was sitting in small group when the AHAV Friendship Dinner was announced and I thought to myself, "Perhaps I can serve God through something I wouldn't normally do." So I decided this to attend the dinner. A few weeks later, the Friendship Dinner turned out to be an awesome experience. It was humbling, blessing and challenging as we were serving men and women who we would normally pass by on the streets. As the rest of the volunteers were setting up the park, I was assigned to a group that had to go to a shelter to invite a few friends to the event. Two people, Frank and Linda, agreed to come with us, and they decided to walk with us to the park where everything was being held. I was surprised how unashamed I was walking with them, as people would glance at us as if something were terribly wrong. I don’t think I would have felt the same way in and of myself. But I felt that God was simply working through us and in us.

At the site, I had a chance to serve one of the friends we brought from the homeless shelter. Frank was from Puerto Rico and didn’t have much family. He probably lost contact with them quite a while ago, and I was able to sense his loneliness. I told him that I would be his friend, but I felt that I should tell him about what Christ had done for us and how much God loved him. After I had shared the gospel, he looked at me and said “thank you.” I don’t know if Frank had accepted Christ, but I know that seeds were planted and he was left with some hope.

Watching the rest of the team interact with the people was also a blessing. There wasn’t one friend that sat there alone. Everyone was engaged in a conversation and serving someone else.
I heard somewhere that God’s plans are sometimes different from ours, and might even look smaller than ours. We want to win the world right away, but God has his own timing. I’m not sure what sort of fruit this event might even bear, but I know one thing that God has begun something for his kingdom and his people through this friendship dinner.

James

Through times of sun and times of rain

2007-08-06T07:50:00.000-07:00

It hadn’t rained during outreach this whole summer. So this Sunday was the first time it rained. We still outreached in the rain – one group went to the park and the other went to Port Authority and then we met up at Open Door/”Senior Citizen area”.

Overall, it was a very interesting outreach day not only because of the weather but because we had Jose finally back from California, Norman joining us for the outreach for the day, and Angela (a friend of Julie Choi who was a part of AHAV last semester) who came from Philly just for the day to visit AHAV since she was interested in starting up a homeless ministry herself at her homechurch.

Linda, Yoojung, Norman, and I went to the park and no one was there but we were able to check out the grounds to prepare for the Friendship Dinner next week. As Yoojung and I were sharing an umbrella and walking in the rain, she exclaimed, “Praise GOD!!!!!” and I asked, “Um why? What happened?” She turned to me and said, “TODAY was supposed to be the Friendship Dinner!” But it had changed to August 5th, next week, because of permit issues. Wow, God is so good and sovereign!

Then, we stopped by the restaurant that graciously offered to cook for the Friendship Dinner at a hugely discounted price (another work of God, holler!) to work out some details. But on our way there, we saw Tijuana and Curtis/Donald (we’re not sure what his name really is) who we talked with for a little bit. Then we trudged in the rain to Open Door where we saw a large group of homeless people hunched under the bridge. We saw some familiar faces there and the other group (Jose, Josh, Angela, and Nanette) were already there eagerly chatting with some of the folks. We had come up with “reinforcements” since they had run out of Friendship Dinner flyers and bag lunches.

As we were handing out the bag lunches, one woman came up to me and reached out for the bag lunch. I was a bit taken back by her semi-aggressive approach since most of the people are kind enough to usually ask first. She then looked at me and started saying some weird stuff that I couldn’t hear or understand. But I did hear her say the words “Satan” and “pray”. After her several incoherent sentences that I’m sure had the words “Satan” and “pray” in it, she said, “bow”. And then she spoke in another language. And then she walked away. As she walked away, she looked back, and gave a really weird smile at me. I was so shocked and taken aback and also fearful because I was pretty sure she had cursed me in the spiritual sense. So I immediately asked Yoojung to pray for me which she did. (Agh, I love our team!)

I shared with the rest of the team what happened later on and they said that they heard that she was mentally ill and heard voices. Before we had arrived at Open Door, she had actually started screaming across the street for no reason. I’m pretty sure that she was demon-possessed or demon-oppressed. Either way, it was a very real spiritual wake-up call that we’re not dealing with just flesh and blood. I hope that one day, we’ll be able to come to a place where we won’t just give out sandwiches and talk to and pray for people but that we’ll be Christ’s hands and feet even in exercising the authority given to us to physically heal people and cast out demons… for this is what Jesus did.

Overall, I’m so encouraged by the team (no one complained about being drenched in the rain even if rain is their pet peeve-i.e., Linda =p) and their hearts of full-on being ready to serve. We’re amazed at the things God has been doing this semester. We’re truly just going along His ride and are excited to see what He is going to do especially next week at the Friendship Dinner. We had the Volunteers’ meeting after our outreach and it was encouraging to see other church members being involved as well. We are SOOOO excited for the Friendship Dinner as we bring church TO the people whom Jesus came to preach to! (Matthew 11:5) Please pray for us!!

2Then Jesus said to his host, "When you give a luncheon or dinner, do not invite your friends, your brothers or relatives, or your rich neighbors; if you do, they may invite you back and so you will be repaid. 13But when you give a banquet, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, the blind, 14and you will be blessed. Although they cannot repay you, you will be repaid at the resurrection of the righteous." Luke 14:12-14

Julia

2007-07-28T19:37:00.000-07:00

A couple of weeks ago, I had an extremely difficult time at Port Authority after giving out the rest of the bagged lunches that Josh, Nanette, and I had left. Some of the men we encountered had abrasive words and an attitude of nonchalance. I think that we use these bagged lunches as the doorway to talk to the men and women we meet in this ministry. However, I’d never
seen people who were this unappreciative and even mean, the whole time I’d been in Ahav. As I vented and struggled with what had happened with my fellow ahavers, I only then began to realize that it really doesn’t matter if these people are thankful to me or not. Though our ministry focuses mainly on building relationships, we couldn’t deny the hungry from food.
Hunger is hunger. Whether these people want to talk to us after we give them lunch and after some coaxing, is really up to them.

At the same time I was still extremely frustrated. These people were young, fit, and fully capable of doing so much with their lives. It was as if these people had grown content with not doing anything and not only accepting charity, but expecting charity. And I actually had an argument last night with my roommate about this, and she had reminded me something that I had forgotten while doing this ministry.

She told me that if she sees a hungry person on the street, she buys that person a sandwich. If she continues to see this same person on the street, she’ll buy him or her a sandwich for a couple more days. However, after about a week, she gets frustrated and won’t buy him or her sandwiches anymore. I asked her why. She responded that if she kept buying sandwiches
for this person, he or she would get used to it and never do anything for themselves. I began to realize that she had fed this person in hope that he or she would pick up his or her mat, walk, and try to get his or her life back together.

I immediately told her, from what I’d seen firsthand, it’s not that easy. It’s not that easy to piece one’s life back together once they are homeless.

At the same time, I started thinking. Maybe some of these men and women have grown content with their situation, and maybe some of them are working as hard as they can to get themselves out of the condition that they are in. But at the same time, many of these people have lost hope. They’ve grown to be satisfied because they don’t know to hope for something more and something better, or even sadder, they may have never even known this hope.

In the midst of all of this, I realized that I’d also just been okay with the way things were with this community. I figured if they’re content, I’m content with that. Instead, I need to be hoping, praying, and loving the homeless in such a way that I want and expect more for them, the same way God wants so much more for us. So, I think the first step is to really pray for those who
are trying, working, and hoping, in addition to praying for those who are living on the street and have lost hope. I believe that this genuine hope can only come from God.

Linda

2007-07-21T15:36:00.000-07:00

Ahav ministry has been amazing. I’m so thankful to work with dedicated and passionate people. Each one of us brings in our talents and became one team. I was excited to be part of this ministry and how God was going to use each and everyone in our team.

I still remember the first day at Dewitt Park. I saw group of people on the bench just talking and having a great time. As soon as we got there, this woman came said, “let’s pray! Let’s pray!” as soon as we got there. We held hands and gave all the glory and thanks to God. Little did I know that this woman was about to make an amazing impact in my life. Her name is Evelyn. She began to share how God has been working in her life, which was absolutely amazing and beautiful. What amazed me was that she was able to share her deepest pain and was able to praise God for those times. So there we were middle of a park crying our hearts with each other. I’m so thankful for those moments. We connected spiritually… as sisters in Christ. I was going through couple of hardships in my life and God used her to encourage me in so many different ways. It was Christ in her that really shines and she was not afraid to show it.

I was going through couple of difficulties when I first arrived in New York. I didn’t expect it to happen and was definitely not ready for it. I did not know how to handle this situation and pain inside of my heart just grew day by day. I wondered why this had to happen while I was in New York. God whispered to my ears that only through Him that I would get healed. God took me out of my comfort zone and wanted to stretch me in so many ways. God wants me to grow by seeking and running after him day by day.

I was able to understand what Evelyn was going through and felt God’s presence as she shared her pain and struggles. God was working in her heart as she shared her pain with me. I was so encouraged by her boldness to share and truly by God’s grace that she was able to find peace again in her heart. God formed beautiful sisterhood bond between us. I was able to see Evelyn again during this week’s outreach. She greeted me with biggest smile and said, “let’s pray again!” She started to tear away as we begin to pray. She said, “thank you, Jesus for always being there. Thank you, Jesus!” Her humbleness and boldness to seek after God really encouraged me and reminded me that I was here in New York for a reason which was to serve in this intercity missions team. I am excited to see what God is going to do next with Ahav Ministry. Please continue to keep us in your prayers!

Phil 1:4

Yoojung

2007-07-13T22:16:00.000-07:00

With Jose in California and Yoojung back at home, we were an especially small group this past week. Now in our fifth week, we had the opportunity to share about our experiences with Ahav so far. Julia, Linda, Josh and I talked about things we’ve been learning so far, and I shared about how I thought it was going to be a lot harder loving the homeless people we met. I was somewhat surprised how willing people were to talk and pray with us.

We continued sharing as we headed out for Clinton Dewitt Park, where we found more people than usual. Although of the faces were familiar, we first met a couple, DJ and Paige, who had just arrived earlier in the week from Tennessee. DJ seemed somewhat suspicious of us at first, but once we started talking, they shared about how they were waiting to get a domestic partnership license so that they could enter a shelter together, since Paige is pregnant. Josh prayed for them, and then we all went to talk with some of the others at the park. We spent time with some “regulars” - Tijuana, Doc, and Henry, and it was pretty relaxing and comfortable. I spent most of my time with Henry. He was one of the first people I met during our first outreach this summer. Even though I hadn’t seen him for a few weeks, we picked up our conversation from where it left off. We talked about music, horse racing, July 4^th, and about my work (he remembered where I work!). He’s one of our friends from the park who really strikes me as such a grandfather figure. Later on, we went to Port Authority, where we talked with Earl and met a woman named Sandra.

At Port Authority, I also met my first drunk homeless person. It was a slightly uncomfortable situation, and when Julia offered him a package of food, he refused and only wanted money. I think meeting him was in some ways for me, a wake up call. It’s interesting how earlier that afternoon, we had been talking about how comfortable and easy it was becoming to reach out to people. I was reminded that much of the “battle” is not just meeting physical needs, but that there are many homeless (and non-homeless) people who are held captive by worldly things. I also felt challenged to be vigilant not just about the physical realm, but also the spiritual. Now with a few weeks of experience, I think I could fall into a routine and stick with what’s comfortable. But I’m thankful that God reminded me of the spiritual needs of people and the importance of prayer. I’m also really thankful for the fellow Ahav-ers this summer. As we share about the ways we’re being stretched and challenged, and we are able to grow and work together. I’m excited to see what more God has in store for us this summer.

Nanette

Clothing Drive

2007-07-06T20:31:00.001-07:00

After service we went straight to the storage to get all the summer clothes onto the gym floor. The gym was devoid of basketball or its followers thanks to AMI Revolution; we are blessed by it even though we didn’t go, how wonderful! It took us a while to figure out what we should do with the clothes. We sorted the clothes into clean and unclean. For the clean we divided it into men and women clothes. We ferociously lacked women’s clothes that are larger than size S, but it was truly a blessing that we had a bunch of T-shirts.

Jose, Linda, and Yoojung took a third of the clothes and went to the park. Julia, Nanette, Daeho (our honorary volunteer, we should really make him a shiny ribbon or a medal), and I took the remainder of the clothes and went to the Senior Citizen Area near Port Authority. When we arrived, we didn’t know where to set up camp, so we stood there hesitantly for a few seconds before a homeless man approached us, led us to a dirty spot and helped us tear up our plastic padding for the floor. Then, a swarm of homeless men and women noticed that the first man did not have to pay for the clothes he took, and came upon us. One of our sisters on the team recalls “At first it was just us busy handing out clothes here and there, [with] a little ‘God bless you’s in between.” Many of them simply said “Give me that” or “What size is that shirt?” Some of them were friendlier; I heard a man saying “We really appreciate you guys coming out here.” A younger man came over briefly and started introducing himself and two of his friends (who simply waved). I remembered him because he got hit by a football later on.

As the crowd thinned, a Caucasian middle-aged woman came and sat down with us. She started telling us about herself and was really open to conversation. We only needed to keep the conversation going. She had come from New Orleans and from a decently wealthy and educated background. Even though she was very talkative, it appears that there were some details of her reason for leaving home that were not as easy to talk about as being in jail, having been catatonic schizophrenic, having been suicidal, New Orleans police brutality, becoming Catholic, or getting sun burns. As our minds were being bombarded by her stories, I thought “uh, Holy Spirit, help us out a little?” Then, Nanette felt compelled to pray for her as we packed up and got ready to go. They held hands and Nanette prayed.

I feel privileged to write about one of Ahav’s special events. To be honest, I also feel privileged to participate in Ahav’s regular outreach sessions. Ever since our summer outreach started, I’ve seen each of my teammates reach out to the homeless strangers without such courage and not a hint of timidity, with firm handshakes and smiles, seeking to win their friendship and trust. It is truly a humbling experience not only to learn how the homeless live and some of their stories, but also from my teammates. I pray everyday that God would break my heart and break each of our hearts for the lost, the poor, and the homeless. I for one have much to be broken down, and much to be taught.

Josh